Will it be third time lucky for Obama and Australia?

US President Barack Obama. Photo / file

Will it be third time lucky for Barack Obama and Australia?

Having jilted us at the altar twice, will the consummate politician finally consummate a presidential visit?

If he doesn't, he'd better have a darn good excuse this time.

Not some bleeding-heart reform to cover 30 million uninsured Americans (health shmealth).

Not some oil leak (what's five million barrels between friends, and couldn't Mexico have handled it?)

And puh-lease, not wars or world financial crises.

They're so yesterday, and we're in both, too, you know.

Barack was supposed to come 18 months ago.

Does he possess a diary? An atlas?

If ANZUS means so much, how come only four presidents have been here in 60 years? And for a combined total of less than three weeks?

How come American newspapers mis-spell our prime ministers' names?

And how come "man of steel" John Howard only rates a couple of mentions in George W Bush's book?

If our countries like each other so much that getting the president down here requires all the formality of "arranging a BBQ", as the US ambassador says, how come Barack has been nothing but a BBQ-stopper?

And why do we only rate two days? ... uh, let's retract that - it's twice as long as he planned last year.

Are we just a convenient place to hang the hat between APEC in Hawaii and the East Asia Summit in Bali?

Are you really coming to see us, Barack?

November 16 is too late for our pony race, but it's perfect for the President's Cup at Royal Melbourne, and your passion for golf is no secret.

Do you love golf more than you love us?

Say it ain't so, Barack.

- AAP