Tears flow as mourners relive Bali nightmare

They tossed handfuls of frangipani and wattle into the waters, fed from a nearby sacred mineral spring, guarded over by the Hindu god Wisnu, the god of protection.

Then they wept as grief overwhelmed the mourners in the hills above Kuta.

One year on, after 202 people died when bombs ripped through a popular night spot, the memories are still raw and the lessons still vivid.

Yesterday, families who had lost relatives, the people of Bali and those who had witnessed the attacks gathered at several ceremonies in Bali, New Zealand and Australia to remember.

Three New Zealanders were killed in the nightclub bomb attacks by Muslim radicals in popular downtown Kuta.

Jared Gane, Mark Parker and Jamie Wellington died and many New Zealanders were injured in the blasts that ripped apart Paddys Bar and the Sari Club, night spots popular with foreigners.

Mr Parker's father, Murray, spoke at a brief, emotional gathering of around 100 New Zealanders at the Bali Dynasty Hotel.

"Ours, the Gane and the Wellington families' worst nightmares were realised that night."

It was hard to imagine the trauma and hurt the people of Bali and those who helped to pull people from the wreckage that night had to visualise and endure, he said.

Mr Parker ended with the words "kia kaha" (be strong).

Foreign Minister Phil Goff told a commemoration service in Bali that while those gathered remembered the worst that humans were capable of, the bombings had also brought out the best in those who survived and others who helped in the aftermath.

"The bombings in Bali took their victims at random. But under other circumstances, had cars arrived earlier or later, had people been standing a few yards to the right or the left ... then we could have faced a much higher toll."

Mr Goff acknowledged the people of Bali, who lost 38 people in the blasts.

"They have suffered so much and our hearts go out to them, too, for everything that they have lost."

The bombings, just over a year after the September 11 attacks in the United States, brought home the threat of terrorism and awakened Southeast Asia to the horror of homegrown attacks.

Ninety people took up a New Zealand Government offer of help to get to Bali for commemoration events.

In New Zealand, Prime Minister Helen Clark spoke at a remembrance service at Wellington's Cathedral of St Paul, attended by about 400 people.

Judy Wellington, the mother of victim Jamie Wellington, attended with her sons Keri and Ben.

Mrs Wellington said she was heartened to hear Helen Clark say that any campaign against terrorism must "address the underlying causes of hatred which has led to innocent people losing their lives".

"There hasn't been much talk about that."

Mrs Wellington said she was in close contact with Jamie's wife, Lissie, and their two young daughters, who still live in Jakarta, where her son had been based.

"She's coping. She's not happy but she's coping. She's strong. The little girls are very young," she said.

Helen Clark said the Bali bombing was "the second awful event in a new wave of terrorism", which began with the destruction of New York's World Trade Centre.

"There was no military target. Their attack was not aimed at a specific country. Their clear intention was to kill as many foreign visitors as possible."

The campaign against terrorism would not be a short one, she said.

Australian Prime Minister John Howard said the Bali bombings had ended Australians' sense of carefree adventure and travel.

"We lost so many and they were all so young and engaged in the great Australian enterprise of adventure and travel."

Mr Howard said every Australian felt affection and support for those affected by the bombings, in which 88 Australians died.

For some who returned to Bali for the commemorations, the emotion was raw.

"If we didn't come back they would have won. We'll keep on coming and sticking it up their face," said Jason Madden, who lost seven friends from Perth's Kingsley Cats football team.

Indonesian Security Minister Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono vowed that Jakarta would bring to justice those still wanted for the attack.

"These diabolical men and their friends of evil simply have no place in our society. They belong in our darkest dungeon."

But as the mourners gathered, Indonesian security chiefs warned of further attacks in Indonesia and the mastermind of the Bali bombing said he had no regrets and he believed he had carried out God's will.

In an interview in an Indonesian newspaper published yesterday, Muslim militant Imam Samudra said: "The faith that I have is in the promise of God to get into heaven."

In Bali, Paddys Bar is again crowded nightly with smiling foreigners drinking cheap beer and swaying to the sounds of a local rock band.

Bar manager Gusti Ketut Nurdiade survived last year's blast and was treated for extensive burns.

But much like the popular tourist island, getting his old life back has not been so easy.

"I'm suspicious of strangers and I can't get myself to look at photos of the bombing.

"It's still all very traumatic. I just want to move on."

- Lucy Bennett of NZPA, and Agencies

Herald Feature: Bali bomb blast