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In a country where public discussion of sex remains taboo, but where a wet sari scene is regarded as an essential part of a Bollywood movie, the job of the censor was never going to be an easy one.
But India's moral guardians appear to have lost patience with three of the country's most popular television channels, accusing them of violating strict broadcasting guidelines and prompting a national debate over censorship.
The networks' crimes were diverse; MTV India was hit with what is known as a "show cause" notice for allegedly denigrating women in its reality show Splitsvilla, while news channel IBN-7 was accused of "encouraging superstition" by reporting that the gods Lord Ram and Hanuman had appeared in a ball of fire in Malaysia.
Meanwhile, Headlines Today, another news channel, raised hackles for celebrating the 62nd anniversary of the invention of the bikini in a report branded "objectionable and indecent".
All three have been given 15 days by the Government's Information and Broadcasting Ministry to justify their actions. If their explanations are not accepted, they could be taken off the air or forced to run grovelling apologies on screen.
Opponents of censorship are bewildered by the arbitrary nature of the bans. Praful Bidwai, a political commentator and human rights activist, said the Indian state was naturally prone to censorship.
"Their motto is, if in doubt, ban it. It is outrageous in some respects, but the bureaucracy is so bloody-minded. There is a lot of prudery and hypocrisy in this society. Until a few years ago even a kiss was banned in Indian films ... "
The latest clampdown comes at a time when reality TV shows have never been more popular in India. The Indian version of Big Brother - Bigg Boss - is drawing huge audiences. And despite - or maybe because of - India's reticence on the subject of sex, there is no question that the shows are deliberately pushing the boundaries.
MTV's Splitsvilla show was certainly never going to win any prizes for good taste. The publicity shot for the show features two bare-chested hunks, bound in thick ropes and surrounded by a gaggle of nubile young women in various states of undress. One appears to be brandishing a riding crop.
TV critic and media commentator Shailaja Bajpai said the notices issued to the channels were laughable.
"They think you can't have a woman on air looking like she's thinking about sex or might enjoy it ... "
She said the problem was exacerbated by the lack of an independent regulator.
Not everyone is upset by the ruling, though. Even Bidwai acknowledged that the television channels were their own worst enemies.
"Some of these channels are not doing a good job of reporting. When it comes to exaggerating the lurid aspects of a story, they can border on the pornographic."
CONFLICTING STANDARDS OVER SEX
India has a contradictory attitude to sex and religion.
Bollywood is all gyrating hips and seductive dances, with the wet sari scenes that leave very little to the imagination a must for many directors; pictures of scantily clad women and smouldering men adorn the pages of the daily papers.
At the same time, religious imagery is ubiquitous and no car on India's roads is complete without a handful of icons on the dashboard.
Yet when television channels showed footage of Richard Gere kissing Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty in public last year, effigies of the pair were burnt in the streets.
- OBSERVER
