On a recent stay at a very reputable New Zealand hotel, I couldn't figure out how to get the wi-fi to work for my laptop.
The woman at reception cheerfully told me down the phone: "Oh, we don't have that."
"You don't have wi-fi? So is there a cable I have to plug into?"
"No sir. We don't have the internet."
I groaned, thinking this seemed typical of New Zealand's medieval approach to internet access. Our shame in the eyes of international travellers.