By KYLIE SMITH
The Port Hedland pub sported the usual cast of dusty, laconic characters in shorts and battered hats found in any Outback Aussie watering hole.
The locals here were, if anything, a little rougher around the edges than usual - after all, it was a port town.
But the garden bar was relaxed and roomy, the steak was spilling off the plate, and this night at the pub was our last taste of civilisation before going bush in Western Australia's Pilbara.
Cold beer in hand, it occurred to me to wonder, what was that odd structure in the middle of the room? It looked almost like a catwalk. Several beers and halfway through the epic steak later, all was revealed.
Well almost all, anyway, as Randy, Cascade and Amber tottered in on impossibly high stilettos, and proceeded to gyrate and shake their impressive assets while the port workers whooped and cheered. This was civilisation Port Hedland style, and suddenly a tent in the wilderness was looking deeply attractive.
In the morning my intrepid mate and I drove inland towards Karijini National Park, through the red rock and spinifex of the remote Pilbara region.
We stopped at a roadhouse, paying the usual exorbitant bush prices for petrol and supplies, and drove on, a fine red dust swirling into every gap and crevice in the car, the ragged stone of the Hamersley Ranges rising up around us.
This landscape has the eerie grandeur of the ancient, and is indeed millions of years old.
Here there is none of the noise and distraction of modern life: none of the hot showers and flushing toilets either.
Mobile phone reception? Forget about it. Newspapers? Not a chance. Visitors must pack all supplies and plenty of water - there is only one drinking water tap in the park's 627,000ha.
At 1400km from Perth, the nearest capital city, and 320km from Port Hedland, Karijini is about as far away from anywhere as you can get, even in the context of Australia's vast scale.
The isolation is part of the attraction, and as we sat silently that night by the tent watching the ghost gums gently glow white in the moonlight, it felt like the beginning of the world.
Karijini, of course, was occupied long before the whitefellas turned up, and the park's visitor centre gives a great insight into the history and culture of the land's traditional owners, the Banyjima, Yinhawangka and Kurrama people.
These people have lived in Karijini for more than 20,000 years, and today they play an active role in managing the park.
The visitor centre is worth the drive - a striking, award-winning structure that swoops out of the spinifex with a curved wall of rusted steel.
In the morning we trekked up Mt Bruce, the second-highest peak in Western Australia, cloaked in a scattered carpet of purple flowering mulla-mulla.
Every corner of Outback Australia has its uniquely bizarre fauna; the lower slopes of Mt Bruce are home to the rare pebble mound mouse. This unimaginatively named little fellow has adapted to the almost impregnable rocky earth of the Pilbara by building its home instead of burrowing, and here you can see the odd mound of stones.
The six-hour return hike up Mt Bruce gave us stunning views, beautiful wildflowers and the occasional whip-slender red gecko flashing across the rocks.
Having conquered the "up""side of Karijini, we turned our attention down, into the plunging gorges that are the park's most arresting feature. They have been carved up to 100m deep over many thousands of years by creeks flowing to the Fortescue Valley.
First was Dales Gorge, where we climbed down to wash away the aches of the Mt Bruce climb in Fern Pool, a deep waterfall-fed swimming hole fringed by lush vegetation and shaded by a towering fig tree, its roots clinging to the surrounding rocks.
In Hancock Gorge, described by park rangers as a "journey to the centre of the Earth", the gorge gradually narrowed as we squeezed through red and black rock walls worn smooth by the passage of wet season rains.
In other gorges, we clambered down ropes over the steepest rocks, and swam through a freezing, permanently shaded pool to emerge at the top of a magnificent waterfall.
By the time we hiked through Knox Gorge, where paperbarks and delicate ferns hovered over yet another idyllic swimming hole, I had run out of superlatives and was reduced to slack-jawed gaping.
The crowds of tourists at some of Australia's better-known Outback parks are mercifully absent at Karijini, where you can run your hands over the exquisitely tactile rock faces in silence, without a ranting horde of English backpackers providing a soundtrack.
While getting away from it all is a cleansing experience, a girl can only go so long without a hot shower and a hairdryer. Now, if only we can find a pub where everybody still has their clothes on.
How to get there
Qantas and Air New Zealand fly to Perth via Sydney or Melbourne several times a week. Fares start at $359 one way.
From Perth you can hire a car or 4WD and drive an exhausting 1400km, or fly Qantas to Port Hedland or Karratha, where you can hire a car or 4WD. Karijini National Park is about a 320km drive from Karratha or Port Hedland. Entry to the park is A$9 ($10.25).
When to go
The best time to go is from autumn to spring, avoiding the hot, wet summers when temperatures rise to 40C. Winter days are warm and clear, but nights can be very cold.
Car Hire
You can hire cars or 4WDs in any of the major centres. Remember, conditions can be harsh and if you get stuck it may be a while before help comes. Always drive with spare equipment for basic repairs and at least 20 litres of drinking water for each person.
Accommodation
Once inside the national park, camping is the only option, at A$10 ($11.40) a night, and campers must be entirely self-sufficient.
If creature comforts are more your style, there is a range of accommodation in the nearby mining town of Tom Price and at Karratha and Port Hedland.
More information
For more information about accommodation and tour operators in the region, try the Pilbara Tourism Association or the Western Australian Tourism Commission.
Tranquillity of an ancient land
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