Public service announcement: if you're up to Denarau lie-by-the-pool trip number seven over the course of your multiple decades on this planet, go somewhere in Southeast Asia instead. Likewise, if you can't do a winter without the waves and skyscrapers of the GC, also go somewhere in Southeast Asia instead. Don't read this as a slight on those fine man-made-island-tastic Denarau resorts, nor on the undoubted easy fun of a Gold Coast getaway. But what's wrong with a bit of culture, history and adventure as well as a suntan?
I often have this conversation with people in the hopes of convincing them a Southeast Asian holiday will give them all the sunshine they want, all the white sand they need to make their friends jealous and, if they pick the right location, all the snorkelling or surfing their waistlines would require to draw even by the end of the trip.
Then I try to hit them with the fact much of Southeast Asia is blessed with jungle attractions as equally rewarding as the beaches. Malaysia is a case in point: you can still have your 4 or 5-star hotel, but isn't that more exciting if it comes with rainforest as bio-diverse as anywhere on Earth?
Then there's the shopping. Again, nothing against the Denarau gift-shops or the bright lights of Surfers, but there are few places that compete with the likes of Singapore, Kuala Lumpur and Bangkok when it comes to space-age malls and roadside bargains.
Add to that the sensational food where eating out every meal will still cost you less than if you were back home and never leaving the house bar your weekly visit to Pak 'n' Save.
And then just as crucially, the gift of learning about the culture and the history of these "same-same but different" (to borrow a famous Thai catchphrase) countries. Cambodia and Vietnam will give you a tropical vacation that provides as much relaxation as you want while also offering up a back story that can feel equal parts tragic as it is triumphant. Either way, it's never boring. It's often deeply moving.
Sure, some people get culture shock the first time they try to combat the heat, humidity and controlled mayhem of a place like Yangon or Hanoi, but you can then escape to a town as tranquil as Luang Prabang or a city-state as Jetsons-like as Singapore.
In 1979, Cambodia and Vietnam were recovering from devastating wars, while malaria was a very real risk everywhere from Indonesia and up the Malay Peninsula, across into Burma, Thailand and Indo-China. Even the stable countries in Southeast Asia back then were a little wild and all — including Singapore (now one of the world's richest and safest countries) — were still very much classified as "developing".
But it's not 1979 anymore! So update your ingrained ideas about Southeast Asia, have a year off from Denarau and the GC, and treat yourself to a holiday that's about more than just cocktails and tan-lines.
• Tim Roxborogh hosts Newstalk ZB's Weekend Collective and blogs at RoxboroghReport.com