It's tricky to mind your manners if you don't know what is considered polite. Photo / 123rf
It's tricky to mind your manners if you don't know what is considered polite. Photo / 123rf
Don’t get caught out by poor etiquette. From cutlery to tipping, Sarah Pollok breaks down bad manners abroad.
After spending my childhood being instructed (and, occasionally, scolded) at the dinner table, I can confidently say that, when it comes to table manners, mine are pretty perfect.
Then, I went overseas. Suddenly, the simplest acts (splitting the bill, dining at 6pm, using cutlery, requesting salt and pepper) didn’t just mark me as a tourist but a rude one at that.
As simple as it would make travel, universal manners simply don’t exist. What is considered impeccable form at a cafe in Seattle could garner judgmental looks at a restaurant in Tokyo.
Thankfully, breaking etiquette won’t get us slapped with a fine or tossed out on to the street. But if you’re eager to blend in with the locals and be a well-mannered traveller, here are some things to consider.
Is dinner typically around 6pm because that’s when we’re hungry, or are we hungry because that’s when dinner typically is? Unfortunately, the answer lies beyond my wisdom but what I can tell you is meal times aren’t the same around the world.
Mealtimes aren't the same all around the world. Photo / Unsplash
It pays to research what time meals are in a foreign country, not just out of politeness but practicality; rock up to a restaurant before 10pm in Spain, South America or India, and it may very well be shut. Yet in Norway, one could see diners filling up restaurants from 4pm.
Tools up
How one gets food from their plate into their mouth is a cornerstone of dining etiquette and one that differs from country to country.
In Japan, Korea, Vietnam and China, where chopsticks are often the utensil of choice, well-mannered diners will always rest them on a chopstick block (if it’s provided) between bites or at the end of a meal, not the plate or table. Travel to India, certain parts of Indonesia, Africa or the Middle East and you’ll have the delightful opportunity to use your hands, but only the right one as the left is typically used in the restroom and is considered “unclean”.
Keep chopsticks on provided chopstick blocks if you want to be a polite diner. Photo / Unsplash
In Mexico, don’t even think about digging into a taco with anything but both hands, but in Chile one should eat all meals (even french fries) with a knife, fork or spoon. Traverse over to Thailand and you can use a fork but remember to never put it in your mouth; instead, use it to push food on to a spoon and eat off that.
Similarly, in France, one can spot the tourists as they’ll be snacking on the bread basket instead of waiting for the meal to arrive, then using hunks of bread to push food on to cutlery or wipe up sauces.
Eating a taco should be done with both hands in Mexico. Photo / Unsplash
Skip the cheese please
Keen for a little salt, pepper or cheese to accompany your meal? The request could get you surly looks from waitstaff depending on where you are. As delicious as the cheese is in Italy, don’t ask for parmesan if it isn’t brought to the table with your dish and certainly don’t put it on pizza or seafood dishes, as Italians consider this poor taste. Similarly, in Egypt and Portugal, requesting salt and pepper if it isn’t on the table is seen as an insult to the chef’s seasoning skills.
Go slow
In New Zealand, it’s normal to woof down a sandwich or snack at your desk, in the car or on the go. Take this habit abroad and you may get some unusual looks. In France, eating while walking around or in transit is frowned upon and meals are typically a slow, considered affair, as they are in Italy or Brazil. Here, meals can easily stretch out for hours and are a time to connect with friends, family or colleagues.
Meals aren't always a rushed affair. Photo / Unsplash
Eat loud, make a mess.
It’s easy to think that slurping, burping and making a mess during a meal is inherently rude but this isn’t necessarily the case. If you’re really enjoying your noodles in Japan, you’ll make a noise as you slurp them up and even drink the broth by lifting the bowl up to your mouth.
Belching after a meal in China and Taiwan communicates the same thing. However, beware travellers who make this claim for other countries such as India and Germany, where it may only be good manners in certain regions. If in doubt, ask a local.
Slurp those noodles loudly if you're in Japan. Photo / Unsplash
Don’t polish your plate … or do
Growing up, many of us were encouraged to eat everything on our plate but in several Asian countries, this indicates you’re after another serving. If you’re done with your meal and aren’t keen on seconds (or thirds) leave a mouthful of food on the plate. Unless you’re in India, where a clean plate shows you enjoyed everything you were served.
A tip for tipping
Just like eating, what constitutes “good manners” differs around the world when it comes to paying. In many destinations, such as Europe or Australia, tipping is occasionally done to recognise outstanding service but in the US, failing to tip is the height of rudeness, while in Japan, a tip suggests the waiter isn’t paid enough and could be firmly returned.
As for the bill itself, while restaurants often have different policies about splitting the bill, never ask to do so in France, where it’s seen as unsophisticated.
