It is comforting to know that in the event of disaster, the plane's furniture is likely to survive long after the passengers have perished. This is an insider's joke, because all aircraft seats have to pass what the trade calls the "16g" test, but the luxury leather recliners in the new business premiere class of Air New Zealand's just-arrived 777-200ER can do much more than that.
This plane not only has an entertainment system light years ahead of what Air NZ has been offering until now, it also has two new classes - business premiere and economy premium - plus a range of new seats with some fancy safety features.
For the unscientific let me explain that a "g" equates roughly to the acceleration force of gravity at ground level. The seats on Air NZ's new baby had to withstand 16g without falling to pieces, according to international airline programme manager Kerry Reeves, the airline's man in charge of the leather slices of paradise.
Apparently, a typical person can handle about 5g before blacking out; pilots are supposed to be able to withstand 9g.
Reeves doesn't go into ghoulish detail about the effects of 16g, but I imagine it to be what happens in extreme circumstances, like a shattered fuselage, where the sheer velocity of the wind pressure instantly sears any exposed flesh. Better not to go there.
But if the worst should happen, it's nice to know that the bulges on the seatbelts in business premiere represent another safety feature: these hold airbags shaped like hockey sticks that are unleashed at 9.3g.
The hockey stick-shape is deliberate. It will theoretically protect your upper body and your head long after you've passed out.
As reassuring as this is, the new-leather smell and the space to stretch your legs are much more appealing features. The seat moves from an upright position to a reclining position. Those with bad backs need not fear; the leather segment behind your lower back is adjustable.
Each seat is isolated enough to be private and spacious enough to exceed all expectations of what an aircraft seat should be.
If you happen to be one of the growing population of obese people, however, you may struggle with the width.
The seats, though practically a canyon compared with economy class - 56cm to be precise - can't cater to every body type.
"It's just not economically viable," Reeves says, before comparing square inches on passenger seats to real estate in a suburb. In those terms, business premiere is a rich suburb. "But," he adds, "everything we wanted to install is on there."
Indeed, I can't think of anything else you could possibly want from an airline passenger seat. There's more than enough to reduce the most demanding traveller to the role of kid in a candy store.
There are enough buttons to convince the untrained eye that each seat is a cockpit. In addition there are two reading lights, a cocktail tray, a power point, an armrest that disappears on request, a comfy footrest - called an ottoman - and even an elastic band to hold your water/whiskey bottle.
The dinner table is large, adjustable, and slides out between the leather seat and the ottoman, making possible a romantic dinner for two, provided your dining partner is willing to sit on the footrest.
The standout feature, though, is the in-flight entertainment which boasts more than 60 movies and television programmes on demand on a personal and moveable 10.4-inch screen.
Some of them are actually good.
The Fantastic Four, 100 minutes of the flight I'll never have back, was not good.
My time was better spent watching Crash, snippets of Batman Begins, and a few Simpsons episodes, some of which I hadn't seen. What an unexpected treat.
What's more, I was able to pause what I was watching when nature called.
The CD library is an eclectic collection, with no shortage of Kiwi tunes. If you have any downtime, the recording of the Finn brothers' concert in London provides some excellent listening.
The entertainment is linked to the mother of all remote controls, the back of which looks suspiciously like a telephone.
Eventually, though, the lure of the flat-bed is what will drive many to pay top dollar for these long-haul seats, as personal screens have long been a feature on other airlines.
The recliner transforms into a 2m-long bed at the touch of a button, provided the computer system hasn't died.
The back of the seat folds down to meet the edge of the ottoman. It's spacious and firm, but soft enough to let you sleep comfortably on your side.
Pleasant low walls all around create an atmosphere of peace and privacy, and pillows, duvet and underlay are provided. Nighty night.
Oh, just in case the controls prove too complicated, don't worry, the friendly Air NZ crew are always at your service should you concede incompetence.
Of course, these seats don't come cheap. Early estimates are that lounging in luxury leather will set you back about $7000 on an Auckland-San Francisco flight.
If that's a bit beyond your limit, it's nice to know every one of the 313 seats on the plane has a personal television screen with the in-flight entertainment - even the economy seats.
The 777 also offers 18 economy premium seats. These each have suede covers, a power point, and slightly more room for about 25 per cent more than the asking price of economy class. But for ruler-of-the-universe style and comfort, you can't beat business premium.
There was a suggestion that we, as the lucky group on the inaugural flight from the Boeing factory in Seattle to New Zealand, had a duty to trash the entire plane, just like a flat-warming.
Unfortunately, it was just too damn nice. So nice, in fact, that just touching anything felt as if we were tainting it.
Flying business premiere is definitely for celebrities and highly recommended, if you have a spare $8000. As with any flying, there's always a risk. But at least you know the seats will outlast you in the unlikely event of disaster.
New-look planes
* Refurbished 747s are flying on the Auckland-San Francisco route and on some Auckland-London services.
* The new 777 is flying transtasman routes for the next fortnight before starting on the Auckland-San Francisco service on November 29. Other routes earmarked for next year include Hong Kong, Tokyo, Singapore and (subject to approval) Shanghai.
* Prices for Auckland-San Francisco are: Economy $1749, economy premium $2549, business premier $6995.
Snuggle up and enjoy the flight on Air NZ's new Boeing 777
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