This time for Africa: Shakira and Freshlyground remain undisputed World Cup Anthem champions. Photo / File
COMMENT:
It has whistles, dad dancing , “ole, ole” and more “ole” - the 3 minute single is the full bingo card of football anthem clichés.
The cabin crew is a new one, though.
Qatar Airways has unveiled a Soccer Anthem for the Qatar FIFA World Cup.
C.H.A.M.P.I.O.N.S by Algerian chanteur Cheb Khaled and DJ Rodge, features three languages, a spelling lesson and plenty of stock sports footage. And it’s not ‘not good’.
A low bar has been set, but it’s definitely not the worst punt at a football song.
The FIFA Airline partner has joined the pantheon of sponsors to have released a pop record for the tournament. As they are wont to do.
Coca Cola has already fired their shot with a lacklustre remix of Queen. This year’s other competing anthems includes the official “Tukoh Taka” featuring Niki Manaj with Colombian rapper Maluma and Lebanese singer Myriam Fares in a hectic blur of French, Arabic and Trinidadian-Bronx patois. There are definitely more shots off target than genuine hits.
The World Cup Anthem is the competition that happens off pitch and - beyond a token soccer ball - rarely has anything to do with sport.
It’s a kaleidoscope of armchair travel, global culture and late era capitalism.
As one of sport’s largest international competitions on the planet, it’s a place where strange cultural influences and celebrity endorsements dance to the tune of soccer sponsorship.
Sometimes an anthem can be the best thing about the tournament.
How can we forget the “Waka Waka (this time for Africa)”?
Shakira’s collaboration with Cape Town-based Freshlyground singing “Zangalewa” could only have happened in the Fifa World Cup multiverse. It was a banger.
Recently named the greatest World Cup football anthem of all time with 3 billion views on YouTube, it was the real winner of the 2016 tournament. ( Especially considering the shocking Holland- Spain final.)
Who could forget the hardly memorable Will Smith’s 2018 World Cup offering, ‘One life’?
Us neither.
The competition also gave us such monstrosities as Robby Williams’ ‘Like a Russian’. Such lazy write-offs highlight the tradition of the ‘take the cash and run’ approach to football anthems. A successful soccer anthem is worth millions in kickbacks - harder to predict is how performance will age or what host countries like the Russian Federation will act after pop stars have pinned their colours to the mast.
However, even with billions more in the budget than Russia 2018, Qatari sponsors have had slim pickings finding stars willing to headline songs.
At a reported price of $200 billion, the 2022 World Cup cost four times the Tokyo Olympics. The tournament is mad, moneyed and more than a little artificial, but undeniably multicultural.
Already the first World Cup to be held in the Middle East, this week it was announced that K-Pop star Jungkook would be performing at the opening ceremony in Doha this weekend. The former BTS member will be flying in from soccer-mad Seoul to perform.
That being said, there are artists that will not be releasing a football single this year.
This week Scots legend Rod Stewart said he turned down a $2m cheque, telling The Sunday Times it was “not right to go there.”
Citing treatment of the country’s LGBT community and the labour practices used to construct the stadia, the Maggie May singer joins the likes of Dua Lipa, and Mel C - AKA Sporty Spice in boycotting the tournament.
But with the tournament being broadcast to hundreds of countries and 32 nations taking part it is going to be hard to ignore.
CHAMPIONS is an inoffensive slice of easy-listening soccer memorabilia.
Just another way the airline has left its mark on the 2022 tournament as a rolling advert for the carrier.
After all it will be flying many of the 1.2 million expected fans. Qatar is running daily shuttle flights to games from neighbouring Oman and the UAE to take pressure off limited accommodation in Doha.
The rising carbon footprint was one of many issues brought up at Cop 27 last week, regarding the host state.
The Qatar World Cup is an international tournament and as such it opens audiences ears to new culture and destinations. Yes, its a football tournament but also the largest global platform you’ll likely find for Algerian raï and Lebanese rap music.
Next week, the game will play on as will valid criticism of the world’s most expensive sporting event. It pays to keep your ears open.
It wouldn’t be the beautiful game without a hideous dirge of a soundtrack.
When there's nothing as far as the eye can see, you may appreciate the company.