Laugh and drink up in India

Getting water is also a social occasion. Picture / Dennis Richardson

The flimsy structure clinging to the edge of the valley didn't look like a restaurant, but that's where our driver stopped for chai. Indians drink the sweet, spicy milky tea by the litre but we were after something cooler.

"Coke?" we asked politely, knowing that it was available throughout the country.

While a boy went to fetch the drink we sat gingerly on filthy chairs while the beaming waiter smeared our grime-covered table with an equally grimy rag.

To put aside thoughts of bacteria, we concentrated on the superb view of a temple at the confluence of two rushing rivers, backed by majestic hills covered in cedar and pine.

Our drinks arrived, warm, and we decided to swig from the bottle rather than risk the chipped, stained cups. Our friendly waiter flipped off the caps, helpfully polished the mouths of each bottle with his germ-infested cloth and presented them with a grin as wide as the valley itself.

There was nothing to do but laugh, and drink up - and we didn't get sick.

That episode typifies India. It's a place where beauty and squalor often sit side by side and where people try hard to help strangers. It's a place where things don't always go as planned, and where laughter is often the best course of action. Most of all, it's a place where the worst will probably never happen. Here are some pointers to ease your travels in this fascinating but frustrating land.

* New Zealand and India couldn't be more different - don't fight it, embrace it.

* India is huge, and travel slow and tiring. Don't try to cover too much ground. Choose a couple of compact areas that give a cross-section of experiences.

* Organised tours can take the hassle out of travel, but choose one that isn't too regimented and doesn't move too fast.

* Even experienced travellers can find arrival in India tricky, so book an airport transfer and your first hotel from home.

* Choose a suitable season. For most of India it's October to February, for the mountain areas it's the middle of the year.

* You can't see everything and it's important to take time out. Talking to a waiter at a restaurant could be just as rewarding as traipsing around another fort.

* English is widely spoken, so get out and about and take an interest in what people are doing. * Trust your driver. He knows how to get around even if you think he's breaking the rules, but ask him to slow down if he's driving too fast. When a pedestrian, be extremely careful.

* Get to know a few Indian dishes, especially vegetarian ones, which make up a large part of Indian cuisine. Western food is available but it's not that great.

* Tip often and generously. It's part of the wages structure. If you give good tips of about $1 when you first arrive at each hotel, then you'll be treated like a maharaja.

* Don't be too anxious about getting sick. Just take sensible precautions: wash your hands; drink bottled water; avoid salads, undercooked meat and fruit that can't be peeled; and keep up your fluid intake. India has excellent doctors and and reliable pharmacies. But for convenience, bring appropriate medication from home.

* Have a medical and dental checkup before you leave home. There are no compulsory vaccinations - unless you've just been to a yellow-fever zone - but the list of possibilities is extensive. Discuss them with your doctor. It's advisable to take malaria medication.

* Beggars rarely approach you but touts can be persistent. If you're not shopping, ignore them. But they're only trying to scratch together a living, so if you're after trinkets, buy from them - bargain hard and with good humour. Don't give money, sweets or gifts to children as it encourages begging. Give instead to a recognised charity or a school.

* Indians are reasonably relaxed about dress, but it's best to be conservative. Women will attract less attention if they cover shoulders and upper arms and wear skirts or pants that come below the knee. Men can wear long shorts but Indians think they are for children.

* Travel with a sense of humour, an open mind and an open heart.

Heather Ramsay will lead her sixth tour to India later this year. Contact (06) 758 5712, or heathden@ihug.co.nz