Travellers share a piece of wisdom or advice they've learned on the road, solo. Photo / Unsplash
Travellers share a piece of wisdom or advice they've learned on the road, solo. Photo / Unsplash
Overwhelmed, Tasmin Waby locked herself inside a toilet cubicle. She was 21 and on her first solo trip to New York City. But when her fear over-rode her ability to process information, she couldn’t figure out how to catch the right subway.
“I had a little cry until I pulled it together,” recalls the travel writer, who now frequently travels for work.
Waby’s story is a reminder that solo travellers aren’t born — they’re made when they’re brave enough to face uncertainty head-on. For me, my “crying-in-the-cubicle” moment happened the first time I requested a table for one at an upscale restaurant. I was convinced that everyone was staring at me. Hundreds of solo meals later, I now know that no one cares.
From airline attendants to sales reps, business travellers are the original solo travellers. We don’t necessarily travel alone by choice, but rather because it’s part of the job description. Here’s the advice professional travellers wish they’d been given before they started on their own solo travel journeys.
Having a solid plan of attack before you land at your destination can help to give you a sense of purpose. “Keeping busy will keep your spirits up and self-doubts at bay,” says Waby.
Ben Whatman, an inflight service manager and flight attendant trainer for Air New Zealand, agrees.
“Planning takes the apprehension out of travel,” says Whatman, who says he used to feel incredibly nervous about using public transport in foreign cities. Now, he uses Google Maps to aid him in both planning and executing his journeys, which includes details such as the platforms, lines and even exit doors to use. “Don’t panic if you get on the wrong train, get off at the next station — breathe and try again,” he says.
Guidebooks, TripAdvisor, and blogs aren’t the only reputable sources of information about your destination, says Mark Buckley, a vice-president of sales for an American software company, who travels as many as 70 days a year for work.
“There’s so much good stuff available on YouTube, where you can see in advance what people think are great places to visit,” says Buckley.
Flavia, a flight attendant, also suggests tagging where you’d like to visit on Google Maps before you land.
“Even if I don’t end up going to every spot, I’ll have a sense of what areas of the city are worth strolling along,” she says. To orient yourself, she also recommends taking advantage of city walking tours, which are often free or low cost. “They’re great at giving you a general layout of your destination — plus helpful tips and cool facts,” she says.
When travelling alone on public transport, tag places to visit beforehand. If lost, don't panic. Breathe, reorient, and try again. Know your exits and lines. Photo / 123rf
Develop a travel routine
More than one hiker that I’ve spoken with reports that listening to music or podcasts when they’re on the trail gives them a sense of normality and helps them forget they’re somewhere foreign or uncomfortable.
Basic routines can help to do the same for solo travellers. Before you set out, try to determine what small act will bring you comfort if homesickness, culture shock or loneliness hit.
For Nettika Berthelot — who spends weeks overseas sourcing homewares and rugs for her online decor shop, Tajmi — it’s as simple as a cup of coffee.
“The first thing I research about a destination is where to get good coffee in the area I’m staying to maintain my morning routine,” says Berthelot. “It helps me feel more grounded in foreign places when I’m alone.”
For Dinh, a Virgin Australia cabin manager who regularly flies between Australia and New Zealand, it’s getting settled into his accommodation.
Embrace your own vacation style. Whether it's disconnecting in nature or immersing in city life, your trip is personal. Celebrate your solitude. Photo / 123rf
“I like to do a security sweep and identify exits of the hotel when I’m checking-in and when I get into the room,” he says. “There’s nothing more comfortable than knowing you’re safe and aware of hotel grounds and facilities.”
And for Iris Serbanescu, owner of wmnsWORK — a tourism business accelerator programme for women and non-binary early-stage entrepreneurs — it’s taking a bath to shift her mindset when she arrives in a new place.
“‘Loneliness’ can signify not enjoying being alone, whereas ‘solitude’ can mean you’re enjoying your own company. I really have to lean into ‘solitude,’” explains Serbanescu. “I create a ritual to create even more intentional space with just myself.”
Remember that your holiday is your own
While it doesn’t pay to book a city escape and then spend your entire holiday hiding in your room, what you do on your vacation is your choice. Spend the time how you’d like to; not how you think you’re supposed to.
Liz Carlson, a Lake Hāwea-based content creator who blogs about her solo adventures at YoungAdventuress.com, says that over the years the way she’s travelled has shifted to more “mindful” travel. For her, that often means disconnecting in a nature-based setting rather than checking in to a city hotel with a jam-packed itinerary.
“I pick places where I enjoy being in that place — like a wilderness stay where I can sit somewhere beautiful, be outside and read a book in that space,” she says.
After all, designing a holiday based on your own whims and needs is one of the biggest benefits of travelling alone.
“The first solo trip will bring out mixed emotions, so don’t sweat the small stuff if your plans fall through,” says Dinh. “You’re on a self-discovery trip, so make the most of being your own best friend at times.”
