Practise your school French, or even better, take kids who are learning the language and let them experience it. Noumea also has loads of restaurants specialising in Pacific/French fusion cuisine and, of course, you won't be able to resist the warm croissants and pain au chocolat every morning in your hotel or from the nearest bakery.
2. Visit the New Zealand WWII cemetery
About two hours drive north of Noumea near Bourail, set on a rolling hill surrounded by soaring pine trees and flowering hibiscus, is the New Zealand World War II cemetery where 246 Kiwi men and women lie, killed protecting the South Pacific from the Japanese. It's a beautifully kept place and well worth stopping at on your way to the beaches of Bourail.
Click here to read my account of visiting this special place.
3. Have lunch with a local Kanak family
I met Jehudit (pronounced JD) and his family from the Napoemien tribe in the north.
He prepared a bougna for lunch of yam, taro, chicken, onions and seasoning, covered in coconut milk, wrapped in banana leaves and cooked for two hours covered in sheets of tree bark over hot coals.
While it cooked we wandered through his land as he explained the plants and village life, and showed me rock carvings that are hundreds of years old.
4. Visit Isle of Pines
For a white sandy beach that feels like talcum powder, take the 20-minute flight to the Isle of Pines. This is where you could be forgiven for the "flop" part of your holiday as you choose which resort to stay at. But even here you'll find plenty of things to keep you busy for at least a couple of days.
5. Get sporty
All year round you'll find kite surfers and wind surfers ripping over the waves in Noumea and along the west coast, but New Caledonia also plays host to big sporting events. Head over for the triathlon in May, Great Lagoon Regatta in June, the marathon in August, PGA South Pacific Open Championship in September or the PWA elite wind surfing champs in November.
Further information: See visitnewcaledonia.com.