Stepping out of your comfort zone with a solo trip can be daunting as a woman, but it’s also deeply rewarding as illustrated by the stories in Lonely Planet’s latest book, Women Travel Solo. In an extract from the book, Jeannette Ceja reveals how stepping into the unknown can transform you
The first of my many solo trips began as a US college student in Sicily, Italy. Growing up, I was introduced to major Italian cities like Rome, Venice, and Florence through travel shows and movies, but I didn’t know much about Italy’s biggest island. I chose Sicily because I wanted to travel somewhere that no one I knew had travelled to before.
On this first solo trip, I had to trust my daily decisions, especially when travelling to a destination where I did not know anyone. I discovered my strengths – and the unknown – while becoming more confident along the way.
Italy, Sicily, Siracuse, Santa Lucia alla Badia church on cathedral square A solo trip can be transformative. Photo / Supplied
I realised at a young age how travel goes beyond anything material. Travel offers the gift of an emotional connection to a place, which can differ for everyone.
Until Sicily, all my travels had been family trips to visit our relatives in Mexico. My first international trip beyond Mexico was a family holiday to Europe as a teenager with my mother, my siblings, and my grandmother, Mama Lulu. It had always been my grandmother’s dream to visit the Vatican, but it would happen more quickly than expected as her health issues progressed and intensified. My mum contacted her travel agent and had the trip moved forward, making sure the Vatican was on the itinerary.
I got to witness my grandmother’s dream come true. On the day our tour stopped at the Vatican, my grandmother got off the bus, pulled out a rosary, and started crying. My family and I teared up watching her dream become reality, and that moment has stuck with me.
It was on this trip that I started my first travel journal. All I had at that time was a pen, a notebook, and a disposable camera, and I wanted to write down everything I saw and capture as much as possible in photos. I didn’t realise it then, but I was already a travel journalist in the making, planting the seeds and building the skill set for what I would later pursue in college and my career.
Syracuse, Sicily, Italy: the cathedral square in the sunset A solo trip can be transformative. Photo / Supplied
Fast-forward to the summer of 2006, and I was a college student studying journalism. I wanted to explore more outside of the classroom, so I registered for a summer study-abroad trip to Syracuse, Sicily. It was a faraway destination where I did not know anyone, which made it even more exciting for me. I knew travelling alone would challenge me in many ways, and I wanted to prove to my family that I could do it – that I could travel alone and not just survive but succeed.
Once I landed in Sicily, I settled into my new home – a room in a shared apartment with two other students. I made an effort to learn and practise Italian every day, so I carried a small English–Italian dictionary with me whenever I went out.
I believe that learning a language is one of the best parts of travelling, and I noticed that the locals appreciated it when I made an effort to speak Italian. I also realised that some locals spoke Sicilian, and although I was studying its sister language, I could only sometimes tell the difference between the two.
During the moments that I was absolutely stuck, I would panic and speak Spanish. The main problem, I found, was the speed at which people talked to each other, which was very different from reading written Italian in my trusty dictionary. I remember one particular occasion: I went to the market to grab some lemons.
Language barriers can present unique challenges. Photo / Unsplash
When it was time to check out, the woman at the register kept speaking so quickly I couldn’t understand what she was saying. I asked her in Italian if she could speak slower – and I think that annoyed her even more. I was so embarrassed. Later, I understood that I was supposed to measure the lemons on a scale, print out the ticket, and bring everything to the register. At that moment, I missed home.
The feelings of homesickness began to mount once the newness and excitement of being in a new country settled down. I especially felt lonely during the daily reposo (siesta), when many restaurants and businesses closed, and the locals went home to their loved ones. The streets were quiet, and I missed my family.
During those reposos, I would often spend time cooking for myself. My usual go-to was tomatoes, onions, pasta, and a side salad, and my meals turned out great – sometimes! For breakfast, I would start my day with bread, jam, and fruit. On weekends, I enjoyed trying different kinds of pasta and pizzas – I would try everything at least once, but my favourite dishes were all the pizzas. When I wanted to meet new people, I would go out to dinner by myself.
As I was single on this trip, I was open to going on dates. I was excited but cautious about the possibility of a summer romance. Could dating in Sicily be like the romance movies I watched? I was ready to find out! This was before dating and language apps existed, and I was still not very fluent in Italian. Despite the odds, I met a nice Italian guy. We went out on a few dates, and it was fun to imagine having an Italian boyfriend while abroad. However, we didn’t last very long, mostly because the language barrier became difficult and awkward over time. Eventually, we drifted apart.
Even though dating wasn’t working out, I kept moving forward. I planned weekend trips, including a somewhat spontaneous jaunt to Rome. Two classmates joined me, and we spent two days in Rome without booking a hotel – our plan being to stay up all night. On that Saturday night, we went to a club and agreed that one of us would sit and watch our things while the other two danced. When it was my turn to stay behind, all I could remember was being woken by a club employee and groggily trying to understand what he was saying in Italian. He was moving his finger in a “no” motion. I was so tired I didn’t even realise I had fallen asleep! Another major lesson learned.
With all its adventures and misadventures, this solo study-abroad journey helped me start to enjoy my own company while also helping me feel more open to making new friends. Today, I feel as though travelling solo is like a muscle: the more you travel alone, whether near or far, the stronger your confidence becomes.
Now, as I write this from France, I am having a full-circle moment. I have recently been accepted to study for a master’s degree in international relations at the American College of the Mediterranean in Aix-en-Provence. Over the past month, I have embarked on solo trips all around the south of France, including visits to Monaco, Grasse, La Colle-sur-Loup, and Villefranche-sur-Mer.
Since that first trip to Sicily, I have travelled to 60 countries – including France, Brazil, Mexico, Australia, Belgium, Italy (again), and Türkiye – plus many other destinations on my own. I even spent six months teaching English to junior high international students in Cairns, Australia.
I always tell everyone, especially women, that regardless of where you are in life or your age, it’s never too late to travel alone or study abroad. Step into the unknown – it will transform you.
People walking on Mount Etna, an active volcano on the east coast of Sicily, Italy. Photo / Supplied
Hiking Mt Etna
My most memorable moment on this entire Sicily trip was towards the end when we hiked Mt Etna. That was the final meeting for our Mediterranean Ecosystem class, and I remember feeling both anxious and amazed at the massive size of Mt Etna as we drove up to it.
Once there, our professor led us around for the day – everywhere we hiked had breathtaking views. At one point, we reached a hill of soft, dark volcanic soil. My classmates and I followed our professor’s lead down into the strange geological area, and it felt like we were running in soft beach sand. It was liberating, and the experience was even cooler knowing it was actually volcanic soil!
Hiking Mt Etna continues to be one of the most courageous experiences I have had to date. There was a sense of risk in hiking an active volcano, and it was a challenge for me to try and prove to myself that I could do it. It felt almost like an out-of-body experience, but once it was over, I felt accomplished and proud.
Lonely Planet’s new book, “Women Travel Solo”, is about the transformative power of going it alone, with 30 women sharing their stories of exploration and self-discovery and practical resources for women inspired to do the same. Available at Whitcoulls or shop.lonelyplanet.com.
