I'm obliged to write another cat pun here... there's a claws in my contract. Also in Sideswipe: a faece-tious hipster defends the latest beard trend.

Pete's photo on dating app Tinder is hilarious, but his description of himself is sure to have all the ladies swiping right... or should that be left.

Diane from Hillsborough would like her children to try and get her something she would like this Mother's Day.

Seen in a Palmerston North cafe.

A royal baby tweet from Coke, a revealing to-do list, bunnies and pregnancy tests.

A Seinfeldian hairdresser in Te Atatu, a philosophical barista at Starbucks, and all manner of ridiculous things.

If they draw smiley faces on antidepressants, what does this pharmacist draw on Viagra prescriptions?

Phil writes: "I was picking up a prescription at Ascot Hospital and noticed a sign for the cafe on the second floor.

Break-up revenge can be acrimonious, but seldom is it so well-thought out and executed.

There's more than one use for a Toblerone, unlike used spraypaint cans, and a public salary review leaves a reader cringing into their cappuccino.

The imminent arrival of a new royal has everyone suffering from baby brain. Also: parenting philosophy, a questionable school bus and diabolical dog owners.

Sky, a British telecommunications and satellite TV company, reportedly forced one unsatisfied customer to endure a 96-minute conversation with a rep just to cancel his account.

A 29-year-old man has been treated for "Candy Crush thumb" after he tore a tendon playing the colour-matching game on his smartphone.

Creative thinker decides to repurpose the MIT carpark as a tip, and today could be your lucky day... if you've lost your GoPro or your expensive watch.

Siri struggles to grasp the nuances of New Zealand English, tourists to the rescue at Piha, Big Brother turns Bin Brother, and help needed finding a lost dog.

A free idea for Auckland transport, a royal flush in Auckland and first space travellers to orbit Earth.

A plaque at Victoria University where a 40-year-old oak tree once stood.

Two Gisborne friends believe they have the answer to an age-old question. Also: a 3-year-old's gender expectations confounded, and pet peacock psychology.

Teaching girls and boys about how they are different from a very early age.

Scott Abercrombie took a photo of this sign at the entrance to a property on the Coromandel Peninsula.

New style for Willy Moon to appropriate? Also: Walkie-talkie hijinks, and an incredible life-improving tip to help avoid the Telecom hold music blues.

A dangerous byproduct of inorganics week? Also: what exactly IS whitebait, the speed of progress c1910, and an Easter driving tip.

A man of extraordinary resemblance, an 'isim' mum and a brutal way to get in shape.

There’s a certain amount of ...er, swagger required to park like that (and have that number plate).

Who you gonna call ... bylaw busters! Also: challenging words to rhyme, an unwittingly satirical stock image, and a woman looking for a kiss...

Impractical crockery. Plates shaped like specific dinners. (By Kahla at 5.5 Design Studio)

Going viral is all in a day's work for a couple of Dunedin cops. Also: a wee case for the tenancy tribunal, and some baby names due for a revival.

Expat Kiwi Ananda, living in the United States, tried to use a prepaid postage label to send an Easter care package, picked up by the postie, to her mum.