I have always found long-term goals fun to set.
At 18, I decided I was going to be a millionaire by 30. Yes, indeed, living the life of Riley; not working, spending my days by the pool in my expansive house, overlooking some incredible beach.
It was going to be bliss.
Of course, it didn't happen. Because after I set that goal, did I sit down to plan how I was going to make my millions? Start focusing on the goal? Put plans in place to make it happen? Nope, I did none of the above. I remember thinking at 25, "uh oh, only five years to make a million." Did I do anything then? Nope. I still had five years - in my mind, plenty of time. I'd sort it out later. I continued to kick the can down the road until, what-do-ya-know? Here I am at 31 with not even close to half a million to my name.
The Government's announcement yesterday of wanting 90 percent of rivers and lakes swimmable by 2040 is almost a rehash of me at 18 wanting to become a millionaire. To be fair, it has slightly more of a plan on how it is going to reach its goal. But, in saying that, it's also making it easier on itself by shifting the goalposts - the equivalent of me deciding $100,000 is pretty much a million.
Ninety percent of rivers and lakes swimmable. What part of that doesn't sound good? None of it until you realise what the Government considers "swimmable".
In the Government's National Policy Statement for Freshwater Management 2014, for a body of water (be it a river or lake) to get an 'A' rating, it has to have rates of E. Coli (the bacteria that gives us campylobacter), less than or equal to, 260cfu/100mL, 95 per cent of the time. It used to be 99 per cent A reading above 260cfu/100mL means there is certain risk to human health.
This doesn't seem to phase the Government though. Why let public health get in the way of achieving? As far as it is concerned, a few tests above that level (up to 5 per cent), and that river or lake is still an 'A'. Yes, a river that makes 1 in 20 sick, gets an 'A'. Sound ridiculous? It gets worse.