Fieldays was the highlight of my childhood, even though it educated me - Glenn Dwight

The annual pilgrimage to Fieldays was the jewel in the crown of 7-year-old Glenn Dwight's childhood. Photo / Glenn Dwight's primary school

Glenn Dwight is the creative director - regional at NZME and columnist for The Country special edition.

OPINION

I shall never forget the annual trip to Mystery Creek and the educational experiences, writes Glenn Dwight.

They say, don’t look back at your childhood; you’ll only be disappointed.

Well, I’d like to disagree, not because I am argumentative, but because my childhood was great.

Sure, it was a simpler time, a time when only the winner got a trophy, we only had two channels (but still managed to argue over what to watch) and owning a Healing Industries HMX 500 made you a god in the Silverdale School playground.

But the real gem in my Hamilton days was the annual pilgrimage to the Fieldays!

Think of it as a rural Disneyland, minus the overpriced Mickey Mouse ears. Here, the dress code was all about practicality: red bands, a trusty Swanndri, and a John Deere hat that needed to be faded, or you exposed yourself as a rural imposter.

The first element of this great day was securing a ride with Andrew’s dad.

He had a golden Holden with all the extras, which included a cigarette lighter (back then, they had nothing to do with charging your iPhone).

So, we’d pile into the back seat and front bench seat, avoiding the 1000-degree seat belt buckle, and drive to Mystery Creek.

And it was a mystery, as the area was usually shrouded in June FOG. Shrouded in MIST-ery.

So, this is where my memories of the event might be as hazy as the fog, but I do remember being off-loaded from the golden Holden and, like Frodo, going on a quest. A quest for knowledge, free stuff, and to see cool stuff.

We’d watch tractors pulling and diggers digging. Fashion in the field wasn’t really a thing, but the quest to get as much free stuff as you could fit in your branded Skellerup bags was a real thing.

Trying to convince a weary salesperson why you needed a cattle prod was always a challenge, but if successful, the knuckle-grazing duels at the end with your mate made it all worth it.

I also add a shout-out to the humble sausage sizzle here, because they were the fuel that kept thousands of schoolchildren nourished.

No pie and V; it was a sausage and a Raro that your mum had frozen the night before. Still not sure what happened to the Marmite sandwiches Lorna pre-packed?

Perhaps another MIST-ery of the creek?

But this being a school-sponsored trip, obviously there was some science in the day...

We’d hunt down helium balloons and have a hoon. So here is the science bit, just in case my standard four teacher is reading this:

“The speed of sound in helium is nearly three times higher than that in air, which makes the sound waves shorter in length and increases the frequencies the resonators produce”.

But the one thing 7-year-old Glenn failed to see, probably because I was on a Raro sugar high, was the amazing innovation that is on display at Fieldays.

When you think about it, it’s no real surprise at all; after all, the rural sector has always been innovators. Think of great New Zealanders like Ernest Godward, Bill Hamilton, and the great Bill Gallagher.

For those like me who might not remember those names from school, here’s a little recap; or “Innovators for Dummies” if you will.

Ernest Godward: In 1900, he invented and patented an eggbeater that prepared eggs for a sponge cake in three and a half minutes; previously, it had taken 15 minutes. I would think that worthy of his face on our currency.

Bill Hamilton: Not actually from the great city of Hamilton, but from the still fairly good town of Fairlie. This Hamilton is famous for his iconic pipe and beret look and for creating the famous Hamilton Jet Boat, which was the first and only boat to go all the way UP the Grand Canyon.

Bill Gallagher: The man behind the electric fence. I do recognise the electric fence for all its cattle-corralling ability, but as an instrument of pure entertainment, the electric fence has brought so much joy to so many. Nothing like a game of Pass the Electric Shock or the ultimate challenge of mind over matter, Pee Between the Wire

And that brings my final rural science lesson:

“Urine is a conductor of electricity due to the presence of electrolytes such as sodium, potassium, and chloride. These electrolytes can allow a small amount of electrical current to pass through the stream”.

A lesson worth knowing.

So here is my advice: if you can, go to Fieldays, and if you can’t, maybe check out a similar event near you and take the kids—you might have the next Bill Gallagher—just waiting for that spark to ignite a passion, the next Ernest Godward ready to beat the competition with innovation, or the next Bill Hamilton ready to jet ahead and look resplendent at the same time.