Annual general meetings are important. They keep organisations kicking along and keep people in line with their obligations to their communities, shareholders and the law.
I like a challenge, and I am a competitive human. I am like a gazelle breaking away from a pack of lions — I will turn around and still show them the rude hoof while managing to avoid what should have been certain death.
This year at the Federated Farmers Northland AGM I plan to outplay and outsmart Federated Farmers chief executive Terry Copeland and Northland's treasure, Regional Economic Development Minister Shane Jones, at the event's unassuming quiz night.
Both are confirmed guests, and both are expected to take part, willingly or tricked into being the quiz captains. I am writing many of the answers to the questions, so already I am ahead of the game.
Will the answers be factually correct? I am going to go with whatever feels natural. In the age of Trump, haven't we all learnt that facts are just alternative?
Most people roll their eyes at the idea of having to attend an annual general meeting. The excuses you get for non-attendance — 'Sorry John, I'm out walking my goldfish,' or 'John — I'm doing my goldfish's hair,' or 'John! I've literally been eaten by my goldfish.'