By Peter Sinclair
It is very difficult to kill a goldfish.
I know this may contradict much empirical evidence in the experience of our readers, but apparently it's true. Essentially: feed it sparingly and seldom, then leave it alone. A goldfish requires very little excitement in its life.
This is the nutshell version of a graphics-light but information-rich web series on these dazzling, graceful, slow-motion creatures by Jennifer Wilkinson (Goldfish, Part I).
It made me want to rush right over to Hollywood Fish Farm and invest heavily in Shubunkin, Oranda, Veil-Tails, Pearlscales and Bubble-eyes on the strength of their names alone.
But bitter hindsight, not to mention the misfortunes of other surfers, suggested it might be wiser to visit the animated goldfish at Bright Star instead.
A very basic model, true, but why stop there? The net is alive - I use the term in its broadest sense - with free virtual pets that require little or no pampering.
The virtual hamster sounded restful if nothing else. "People who like hamsters will know what to expect," it says tactfully. In other words, not a lot. You feed your hamster by clicking its dish. It will sleep, stuff its cheeks with food, sleep, groom itself, and sleep. You can get its attention with your cursor, but hamsters have a very short attention-span.
You may well feel you need a more active companion, like a virtual dog. Walk it without leaving the keyboard - both pet and park are virtual. Visit the pound and pick a pooch [supply an e-mail address or your dog will run away].
Three years ago I chose an endearingly ugly pug and a name which I felt best expressed the spirit of the thing: Gates.
He's still there, amid clickable furniture - the phone, for example, is pre-programmed to call the Park Supervisor, who let me know a virtual panther had just escaped from the virtual zoo; no walkies today, Gates.
Surf the Computer Petz Web Ring for desktop pets which are low-maintenance, affectionate and keyboard-trained. Some develop personalities based on the training and interaction you give them.
I also found creatures whose potential as pets had never entered my head. "Bubbles" turned out to be not a goldfish but a boa constrictor.
I think I'll just stick with a Yippee screensaver.
Links:
Goldfish, Part I
Hollywood Fish Farm
The Goldfish Guide
"I'm bad with goldfish..."
"The fish all died..."
Virtual goldfish
Virtual hamster
Virtual dog
Computer Petz Web Ring
My Pet Boa
Yippee Screen Saver
your net//: Cyberpets yours at the click of a ... mouse
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