Maybe, out there somewhere, Dave Rennie is allowing himself a tight smile over the abject exit of Eddie Jones’ Wallabies from the World.
But neither he nor anyone connected with Australian rugby - and plenty who aren’t - will take any real pleasure from the 40-6 humiliation at the hands of a Welsh side that was well-drilled but no more than efficient.
The Eddie Jones youth experiment has failed miserably. One win in eight tests would normally be the death knell for any coach, though Australia Rugby’s “mastermind”, chief executive Hamish McLennan, must now sort out what happens to Jones, brought in when they spat Rennie out and decided to spit just about everyone else out too in the name of rebuilding with youth.
Anyone who knows the game understands it needs a strong Australia. What they have now is an ugly mess. McLennan’s advice to “Wallaby detractors” was not to watch the game - a deluded pronouncement that only adds to the misery.
Perhaps the most eloquent assessment of where Australian rugby is right now came from former Wallabies loose forward Stephen Hoiles after a match that everyone other than Welsh supporters was hoping would end early and lessen the embarrassment; with 15 minutes to go, there was a feeling of dread.
Hoiles stopped short of vilifying Jones, though he admitted he’d be blamed and deserved criticism: “I think the selection of some of these assistant coaches, looking back, they weren’t the right people to take us through a World Cup campaign.”
As for the players: “Some of these guys are not ready for test rugby yet. That’s not being mean or personal, it means too many of them haven’t played well at Super Rugby level... when I look at this side, I see a bunch of kids playing against men. We took our men out of this campaign and said, ‘let’s put more kids in and they’ll learn and get better’. Well, sadly, they may not get better; some of them may not recover after this.”
On Super Rugby Pacific: “We have five Super Rugby teams, with the Brumbies the most successful... but we are in a failing Super Rugby system. Broadcasting wants more product, more teams. But more teams make us unsuccessful... we don’t have the depth of talent to play this many players at a professional level. it needs to be three or four [Super Rugby] teams at the most. Schools rugby is pumping, so is club rugby - we are just not successful at state and national level at the moment.”
It’s hard to disagree. The Wallabies looked almost completely devoid of ideas; they were outdone in the lineouts, at the scrum, at the breakdown, in turnovers - every element of possession-gathering - and they had little or no ability to break the line when they did have the ball. By the end, they were clearly suffering; the dominant emotion on their faces was shame.
It’s a long way back from that.
While we are on the subject, another disappointment of this World Cup has been the performance of the Polynesian sides, Samoa and Tonga.
Fiji, technically Melanesian, have been the standout Pasifika side, beating Australia; they should also have beaten Wales. But, with Samoa and Tonga, perhaps the new eligibility laws wallpapered over the cracks, more than somewhat. The sight of several former All Blacks and former Wallabies lock Adam Coleman in the Tonga team, for example, made it look as if the Tongans would be formidable foes - and Samoa too.
But here’s Le Cup’s view of why that wasn’t so:
1. A lack of top-level rugby, allowing the island teams to grow in combination, experience and confidence.
2. The value gained by having the Fijian Drua team in Super Rugby Pacific has been clear.
3. Coaching: it’s been noticeable that, while scrum technique has improved, lineout efficiency hasn’t - and too many Samoan and Tongan players simply don’t know the laws well enough at the breakdown. The puzzlement as they leak penalties is written all over their faces. Again, more top-level games would fix that but, if they are not producing upset wins at the World Cup, who will want to play them? So the vicious circle continues.
4. Discipline: better than it was, but they still leak too many penalties for avoidable infringements. A yellow and red card against Scotland, both deserved.
Quiz: Test your Rugby World Cup 2023 week two knowledge
5. Refereeing: that said, we won’t call it unconscious bias exactly, but there is little doubt in Le Cup’s mind that referees and assistant refs watch the Pasifika sides far more hawkishly than others, perhaps as a result of a reputation gained over the years for fearsome tackling. Case in point: during Scotland v Tonga, Tonga flanker Sione Havili Talitui is pinged after a linesman spots him taking out a Scottish forward off the breakdown. It’s a common misdemeanour - taking a clean-out a little too far by taking out a man slightly off the ruck. But when the Scots do the same thing later in the game... silence.
6. Many of the former All Blacks and other internationals have seemed to be, ahem, very former. Name one who stamped any kind of dominant mark on their games so far. Maybe Charles Piutau in Tonga’s first match. But otherwise? Didn’t think so.
The secret thoughts of Eddie Jones, international rugby coach and media manager
Hello? Is that Japan? Konnichiwa... it’s Eddie. Yes, lovely to talk to you too. I just wondered if whoever it was who leaked the false fact that you interviewed me for the Japan head coach job before the World Cup even began would keep quiet now, please.
No, it’s not helping, you see... it doesn’t look good. There I am talking about building a side with youth but if I’m seen to be talking to another country about a head coaching job less than two weeks before the World Cup begins, it kind of looks like even I don’t believe what I’m saying.
What’s that? Why do the crowds boo me when they see me on the big screen at the World Cup? No, mate, no... it doesn’t mean I am unpopular. No, no - I think you’re mishearing. It’s all the Aussie fans going “Roo, roo”... it’s an Aussie cheer, mate.
Hello? Hello?
Hooker: Peato Mauvaka (France)
Props: Andrew Porter (Ireland), Tadgh Furlong (Ireland)
Locks: Tadgh Beirne (Ireland), Thibeau Flament (France)
Flankers: Jac Morgan (Wales), Charles Ollivon (France)
No 8: Caelen Doris (Ireland)
Halfback: Antoine Dupont (France)
First five: Johnny Sexton (Ireland)
Second five: Bundee Aki (Ireland)
Centre: Chris Harris (Scotland)
Wings: Damian Penaud (France), Duhan van der Merwe (Scotland)
Fullback: Blair Kinghorn (Scotland)
Those in bold were in last week’s team.
Paul Lewis has been a journalist since the last ice age. Sport has been a lifetime pleasure and part of a professional career during which he has written four books, and covered Rugby World Cups, America’s Cups, Olympic & Commonwealth Games and more.
England players were questioned by police as soon as they landed at Christchurch Airport.