Peter Bills: Banality rather than brains in the handouts

COMMENT

Political crap-chat, the art of talking endlessly and saying absolutely nothing, was once the preserve of Westminster and the White House.

Alas, its insidious spread into sport was underlined in Australia this week with the issue of propaganda so ludicrous you all but fell asleep in the soup reading it.

Rugby used to be known as a sport of people with some brains. Alas, the verbal diarrhoea of banality emitted by most contemporary players is the ultimate indictment of professionalism. We used to expect more of rugby's sons.

But what is most disturbing is the attempt at media manipulation by a growing number of rugby authorities around the world. By making access more difficult to the modern player and offering prepared scripts of tripe, certain rugby unions are endeavouring to bypass conventional means of communication, that is the irksome (in their eyes) written media, and especially those asking difficult questions.

Consider this garbage issued by the Australian Rugby Union this week, as Australia and South Africa prepared for tonight's Tri-Nations test in Perth. George Gregan will play his 100th test and what was grandiloquently termed "a Wallaby Media Unit transcript" was dumped into my computer 24 hours ago. It offered the following nuggets.

Media unit: George, firstly, the shoulder, it's okay and you've been picked to play on Saturday?

Gregan: Yeah, it has come through all the training really well and I've been able to train fully with the squad, so I'm just looking forward to the game in Perth.

MU: It must be pretty exciting considering it's your 100th test for Australia?

Gregan: Yeah, it has come around over the years and you don't think about it too much, but I'm really looking forward to playing the 100th game and playing with a great bunch of guys, which is what this team is all about. I just want to play well personally and I hope the team gets a good result as well.

MU: Does it seem a long time ago that you made your test debut in 1994?

Gregan: It goes quickly. It doesn't seem like a long time ago, it seems like a short time ago. I think that's probably just the way your career can go in sport.

MU: It is going to be a big test isn't it against South Africa after they showed against New Zealand that they are a side that can play?

Gregan: They are always big test matches.

MU: Thanks, George, and good luck for your 100th test.

Gregan: Thank you.

The Australians recently concluded a sponsorship deal with Qantas and now call themselves the Qantas Wallabies. The Sanitised Wallabies would be a more apt description. While the Australian media kick their heels in frustration at their inability to sit down themselves with Gregan and get something of interest out of him, this tripe is circulated widely. The Australian media smell a plot.

They allege that access to the Wallabies has become increasingly difficult. As it has, to be fair, to just about every international rugby squad.

Sir Wilson Whineray, one of New Zealand's most esteemed former All Blacks, alluded to it this week when he cautioned against what he saw as England's laager mentality in which they secrete themselves away from the outside world.

That attitude, he said, was dangerous. Young players needed exposure to the outside world, to others' views and, yes, to constructive criticism. Hiding young people away from all that, was bad for them and for the game.

Happily, the South Africans under coach Jake White offer a quite different approach in this field. Players are generally available and given responsibility to talk freely with the media. More importantly, most have something to say.

* Peter Bills is a rugby writer for Independent News & Media in London