Chris Rattue: Boks beautiful - till they try to pass the ball

This is your captain speaking.

Then again, it might also be the coach.

Yesterday's Tri-Nations rugby test at Newlands could be described as a gritty but messy battle, mildly interesting from a long-term point of view, and an utter waste of time in entertainment.

Rugby can be a wonderful game, but the pursuit of victory often means its beauty must be tucked away. In an age of wall-to-wall sport on whiz-bang televisions the Springboks versus Wallabies clash was as flat as a modern TV screen.

The Aussie commentary team is terrific in the Super 14 but their Wallaby-bias didn't help the experience for a neutral watching this test (our commentators aren't exactly down the middle either). Referee Alain Rolland didn't appear in good control at Newlands. It was a touch bizarre, and not too classy.

It was actually a horrible reminder of the last World Cup. Bombs away - and watch rugby explode in your face.

The Springboks are an awesome side, until they start trying to pass the ball to each other. They are to beautiful rugby what the infamous Wimbledon side were to beautiful soccer when Vinnie Jones played for them.

The IRB must be tearing their hair out. They cop a lot of abuse, but at least the game's administrators are trying to make rugby a spectacle, even if they often fail.

In the end, you can't legislate against the attitude of the coaches and players. If teams want to turn rugby into a mind-numbing business of hoisting up and unders and chasing the $ per cent#@ out of them, then there is very little that can be done about it.

There was only one moment in the game that looked like rugby as some of us used to know it - when Australia spun the ball left in the first minute and scored in the corner. Lovely that.

Not our hosts though. Not on your nelly. On almost the only occasion that South Africa tried to launch an attack, Morne Steyn hurled the ball into JP Pietersen's noggin.

Even when a flailing Australian team were down to 13 men, South Africa could not tear them apart with tries. It was a sad sight, not for South Africa perhaps, but for rugby.

Up and unders, force back and their associated tactics are a part of the game, of course. They always have been.

Now they are the whole deal. The experimental laws have amounted to stuff all.

Did Fourie du Preez, the wonderful South African halfback, really spend his childhood dreaming of putting on the famous green and gold jersey so that he could hoof the pill into the heavens for 80 minutes. Maybe he did. Or did he dream of another game, of sending passes to fabulous runners.

The Springboks have magnificent players capable of bludgeoning teams into submission, but they are not a great side.

After the match, the Bok captain, John Smit, described his side's performance as clinical - something open to dispute.

Then came the add-on. He said there would come a time when his team would have to start moving the ball by hand, and they would be clinical about that too.

So, if we are to believe that, what we are seeing is the setting up of a base camp, as South Africa prepares to scale the peaks.

When Smit speaks, it pays to listen.

A rugby mystery is this: just who does coach the world champion Springboks?

It can't be Peter de Villiers, who is the coach. De Villiers was about as visible as a vegetarian sausage on a jaapie barbecue before he took over from World Cup winner Jake White.

Many profiles of de Villiers begin with what he hasn't done as a coach in senior rugby. This is the obvious place to start because he hasn't done a lot.

It is inconceivable that a junior coach of no senior repute could take charge of a world championship winning side, and tell blokes like Smit, Victor Matfield, Bakkies Botha and Fourie du Preez what to do.

It is widely accepted that de Villiers was a political appointment, another step in the racial integration of what was - and still is in a way - a country destroyed by apartheid.

From this distance, it is best to make little comment on the wisdom of de Villiers' appointment except to say that South Africa was ravaged by a manufactured system, so maybe it needs to manufacture a few things to sort it out. It is heartening, inspiring even, to see so many players of colour in the South African side. Perhaps the controversial quota system aided that.

Maybe the reason de Villiers needed to be appointed as the Springbok coach is that South African rugby still struggles to give coloured coaches their due chance down the line.

Whatever the political implications, the sporting ones are clear. Peter de Villiers hasn't got a hope in hell of telling Smit and co how to play the game.

The question is, who does coach this side. I thought that maybe Dick Muir, one of de Villiers' assistants, might be in control. I was assured in no uncertain terms by a South African contact recently, someone with good rugby links, that Smit is in charge.

I can't directly verify that, but it is easy to believe. The veteran Smit is the Sean Fitzpatrick of South African rugby, a no-nonsense front rower who wields enormous power on the field, and no doubt plenty off it.

An implication is that such is his influence, utility front rower Smit orchestrated his positional switch to prop - a dubious one in scrummaging terms - because hooker Bismarck Du Plessis' starting claims could not be denied.

If South Africa can add a running game to their core business, which is based on a peerless lineout and an imposing if sometimes clunky mix of power and athleticism, they will be almost unstoppable.

But for now, you would question their ability to find a running game. If it doesn't click, they are very likely to revert to type.

At least South Africa should try. They are under no obligation, of course, but they have the players to do it - Bryan Habana is virtually wasted in this side.

Despite having Australia on the ropes, the Springboks were outscored by two tries to one on home soil yesterday. That says a lot.

As for Australia, George Smith is a true great and they have cracking backs. But the Aussies have a serious lack of forward venom and muscle around the field. You could pick on a few aspects, so let's try Al Baxter. It is a surprise that Robbie Deans is persisting with such a lame front rower. The return of giant loose forward Rocky Elsom will be a pivotal moment in judging what Deans can get out of this team, but Elsom won't be able to turn things around on his own.

The Aussie speedsters and steppers were crushed in the shambles at Newlands, their jets laid low by prop power.