KEY POINTS:
Auckland has had its share of development projects collapse into vacant holes over the years. The vast inner-city carpark in Victoria St where the Royal International Hotel once stood is the most obvious.
But has there ever been a grave to lost dreams to match the vast pit
created at the top of Ponsonby Rd, dug to accommodate the stalled Soho Square project?
The vast five-storey-deep pit has remained idle for more than two months, and while the developers try to maintain a brave front, the rest of us can only stand and fantasise about what might be, now that the controversial $250 million commercial and residential project has come to a standstill.
Somehow I suspect it's too late to try to get back the excavated soil and clay. And having got rid of the malodorous perfumes of the old vinegar factory, it's unlikely the locals would look kindly on offering the great pit as a home for Watercare's Mangere treatment plant's surplus biosolids.
Neighbour Deborah White, of Whitespace Gallery, opposed the Soho grand plan, so she's got her fingers crossed that the present stoppage proves permanent, though she's not keen on remaining next door to a vast hole for too long.
She's hoping that someone will get around to at least building the planned five storeys of below-street-level carparking. Ponsonby needs that, she says.
"Then on top of that they could build a new contemporary art gallery. Considering we don't have a national museum for the visual arts, it might be quite good."
But what about plans for a grand gallery down on the Tank Farm? That, she says, is 10 years away; this is available now. "It's a great opportunity to do something really fabulous with a great site."
Alternatively, "we have discussed filling it with water, mixing in a truckload of gelatin and food colouring, and making it into a big jelly."
Of course, with the debate still rumbling over a venue for the Rugby World Cup 2011, we could always terrace the edges of the excavations, and create the world's first underground rugby stadium. With 1.3ha to play with, there'd be room for parking as well. But who needs parking when the planned underground rail link between Britomart and the western line could stop under the halfway line, and whisk punters back and forth around the city.
Soho development critic and one-time Metro editor Nicola Legat is quite keen on adding to the water already lurking at the bottom of the excavation and turning it into a giant swimming pool - or a lake where the idle gentry of Ponsonby could while away their time punting to and fro while supping on their sav blancs.
In the winter, she dreams, it could became a large skating rink.
On the other hand, if water sports prove too difficult, Ms Legat suggests it could become a great adventure playground for the mountain bikers and BMX enthusiasts who have been sneaking around Ponsonby building illicit tracks around the back of the zoo and beyond.
With the popular Victoria Park skateboard venue's days numbered by the planned road tunnel under the park, a Soho substitute would solve that problem. Given the size of the venue, there's also plenty of room for rock-climbing, bungy jumping and a medley of other adventure activities.
Alternatively, someone like landscape artist and local resident John Reynolds could be let loose on the site to come up with some sort of remedial solution. Reynolds has branched out from the studio and tackled outdoor landscape "canvases". He says he'd be delighted to confront this huge problem.
But he makes a good point. It needs the city council, who approved the existing mess, to take some leadership and say, "All right, that's not going to happen, let's look at something else".
"They could run a competition among city landscape and architecture firms asking them what is their recommendation in response to this bloody great hole."
What will be unacceptable is if the council stands back and leaves this ugly construction site to decay away as it is. It's a blot on the landscape, approved, against community opposition, by the council. If the present inaction becomes permanent, the council should take a lead and ensure some form of rescue mission begins.