In some ways it was easy for hooker Derren Witcombe to accept his neck injury would eliminate him from the All Black tour.
When he weighed that disappointment against life as a paraplegic or worse, Witcombe was philosophical about his fate.
The 26-year-old revealed yesterday how close he came to permanent damage when he was trapped under a collapsed scrum in Auckland's unsuccessful Ranfurly Shield.
A bulging disc on the left side of his neck had pressed against his spinal column, leaving him without feeling in his legs and arms for some time after he was carried from the field.
After x-rays, CT and MRI scans and a visit to a spinal specialist, Witcombe was told he had to wear a heavy neck brace for three weeks and was then likely to need surgery and six months rehab if he wanted to return to rugby.
"I kind of had a gut feeling what it was going to be like," he said.
"You've just gotta move on really, you can't dwell on it, I am just happy to be on my feet to be honest. I was told last night it was pretty close so I am pretty happy in a way."
Asked what he meant by close, Witcombe said the medics told him he was "within a whisker of being paralysed".
Witcombe recalled how he fell awkwardly under the weight of a twisting, collapsing scrum, heard a pop in his neck and then felt nothing. He tried to get up and couldn't. As he lay on the Jade Stadium turf without any feeling in his limbs, his mind ran through all sorts of scenarios.
Witcombe made his All Black debut this season against Fiji and followed with four more test appearances from the substitute's bench. His injury has delivered a variety of selection sequels.
All Black team-mate Keven Mealamu will start for Auckland in the team named today for Saturday's second NPC semifinal at Eden Park.
Mealamu will oppose Harbour's Joe Ward who must now have moved into the reckoning for the Blues squad for the inaugural Super 14 series.
Then there are the All Black ramifications for the three hookers who will be taken for the attempt at Grand Slam success next month.
Mealamu and Anton Oliver are likely to be joined by either Corey Flynn or Andrew Hore on that trip.
All Black coach Graham Henry offered Witcombe his sympathy yesterday and said if he showed the same determination in his rehab as he had on the field this season, he could return successfully to his sport.
"He is a quality athlete, highly skilled, who fits in well with the group and has made a positive start to his All Black career," said Henry.
The national coach had not eliminated Canterbury prop Greg Somerville from the touring squad after he strained his right calf muscle in the opening minute of their final Ranfurly Shield defence.
"I don't think it is as bad as originally thought. Whether he is going to recover quickly enough to be considered for the tour, we won't know for a few days but the early indications are reasonably positive," said Henry.
He was always wary at this stage of the NPC, anxious about the possible attrition rate before an All Black tour.
Leon MacDonald was another player struggling with a knee problem but Henry was meeting him this week and was sure the utility fullback would recover in time for the trip.
All Blacks returning to the NPC had generally played well and were in good shape and the intensity of the series had lifted in games like the final Ranfurly Shield challenge.
The selectors had "virtually" settled on their 35-strong squad but would have to bring in another hooker for Witcombe and wait to gauge any further damage in the NPC playoffs before they revealed their squad on October 23.
Witcombe 'within a whisker' of being paralysed
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