Designed by a 5-year-old with a box of pastels of which light blue was the only unbroken colour. Even the nicely stylised crest can't save these jumpers, apparently produced by Uruguay Rugby in-house supplier Teros.
The multicoloured round-neck collar is strange. Evidently, they're not the worst team at the World Cup, but they're definitely the worst-dressed.
Dan Ahwa says: Is this the uniform for the official cleaning teams at the RWC?
19. Ireland
What in the name of Maewyn Succat is going on here? The alternative jerseys look suspiciously like the T-shirts designed for self-consciously overweight men that always find their ways into bargain bins at outlet Banana Republic stores. Rankings has one just like it.
The jumpers have incorporated Ogham script into the design, a medieval alphabet used to write early Irish language. You can't fault the classic home jersey but Canterbury's alternative is so repulsive it's dragged these proud Irishmen to one step below the basement in the fashion stakes.
Dan says: The national colour of green works well here, but the alternate jersey looks less appealing. It reminds me of something a bunch of PE teachers would wear on an away day.
18. Namibia
There's nothing particularly wrong or right about the Mizuno produced strips. The Samurai breastplate design and gently sloping numbers elevate them beyond the totally boring, but only just. Perhaps we shouldn't expect sartorial fireworks from a team whose nickname – the Welwitschias – comes from a low-lying plant.
The most striking feature of the jersey is the Namibian crest, a stylised eagle whose wings extend beyond the circular boundaries of the logo. Cool.
Dan says: They're all booked for a one-way trip to Squaresville with this look.
17. USA
It's hardly Canterbury's fault, or USA Rugby's for that matter, but we've so many Trump rallies on the telly now that we all know how ugly American nationalism looks.
Having the stars and stripes across the shoulders and sleeves instantly has your eyes going upwards to see if said shirt-wearer is sporting a red MAGA hat. Aside from that, the home jersey looks relatively sleek and the alternate jersey is a fine second option if not for all the flag-waving across the top.
Dan says: A very corny jersey that looks like it was designed in Microsoft Paint.
16. Russia
Canterbury usually get criticised for playing it safe, so Rankings is going to give Russia some credit here for taking a (far) left turn. Not quite sure what's going on across the chest there but at least it's something.
Dan says: Looks like they're on the way to a folk night? Not vibing this at all.
15. South Africa
The jerseys look like they have been sprayed with anti-graffiti paint so that nothing will stick to them. Asics has given them a collar that looks like they're all either wearing white singlets, or they're some ode to the Roman Catholic church.
The Springbok green will always be one of the iconic rugby outfits, but they do not need to be this glossy.
Dan says: The white shorts make this feel a little dated, plus I don't get what's happening around the neckline. Are they meant to look like they're wearing a white T-shirt underneath their jerseys with a yellow neckerchief? Confusing.
14. Australia
That thing is so yellow Coldplay wrote a song about it. The song has aged better than this jersey will.
If the floodlights fail, matches involving the Wallabies will be able to continue via the light of their shirts. Okay, okay, we're being really mean about this Asics jersey because it's Australia. They call it gold, we call it canary yellow.
They get a big boost up the list because the alternate strip has an Aboriginal-inspired design. The collar remains awful though and the crest is really complicated.
Dan says: David Campese calls it "gold", but the colour is not unlike a terrible case of jaundice. It's hard to make jaundice yellow and broccoli look great together, but perhaps that's part of the Wallabies strategy - to wear the most questionable colour combination ever so as to deter the competition. The only thing that saves this is the alternate jersey's inclusion of a terrific indigenous motif.
13. Tonga
Backed by Japanese sportswear firm Mizuno, Tonga's jersey has a nice touch if a little imperceptible from a distance: the thin horizontal stripes are designed to look like a Samurai breastplate.
Like Namibia's design by the same producer, nothing much stands out, though the flashes down the side have some interesting detail.
Dan says: Sharp use of red and white here. Not bad, not great.
12. Canada
Rankings really likes the maple-leaf detail across the chest. It really, really likes the Canada Rugby badge. The collar is simple and effective. Sure, it's just a red jersey but it reminds us of a time when men were men and Canterbury rugby jerseys all looked like a sturdier version of this.
Dan says: I never realised that it was possible to make a vibrant colour like red look so dull, yet the Canadians have succeeded here.
11. Fiji
ISC has stayed true to form here with Fiji's classic black-and-white look, though the detail is more elaborate and effective.
Got to admire a crest that is unself-conscious enough to label them the "Flying Fijians". The great shame is that after two games, including one against lowly Uruguay, they're not.
Dan says: Another great example of a jersey that celebrates indigenous design.
9. Georgia
Georgia gets bonus points here because their jersey is such a departure from previous iterations.
In 2015 they turned up in an Under Armour number that featured the Georgian cross. It was striking but not necessarily in a good way.
Here, with Canterbury as sponsor, they've gone for a deep maroon in the home jersey, white in the alternate. It works. It's a nice package, with the flag on the sleeve and their curious badge also catching the eye.
Dan says: It looks comfortable. I would wear this to the dairy.
9. Scotland
Like their Celtic mates from across the Irish Sea, Scotland would rank a lot higher if Macron hadn't produced a bilious alternate.
Unmistakably Scottish, the home shirt will always look good because they've appropriated the greatest shade of blue ever created. The shirt has some bells and thistles, including Mackintosh toffee-wrapper tartan across the shoulders and in the collar's placket.
This package would rate a lot higher if it were not for the thistle being just a smidge too big and the alternate jersey sporting a washed-out blue.
Dan says: Surprisingly cool with the inclusion of tartan patches on the shoulders. Not sure about the V-neck tartan bit though. How about tartan shorts next time? A tartan tracksuit?
8. England
As Dan mentions below, Canterbury has done a nice job of England's kit but… but, it's England. That white jersey just isn't going to cut it with New Zealanders.
If it came with the weight of success Real Madrid's all-white strip carries, then maybe we'd have a bit more respect for it but as it stands, the whole red-rose-on-the-chest thing just makes the faces of those who wear it a bit slappable.
The red alternate with navy shoulders is okay, but again you can probably sense Rankings is not as keen on it as Dan is. Never mind.
Dan says: A crisp and sharp white look. The red side slashes and asymmetrical collars are an interesting detail. Alternate kit obviously less susceptible to visible marks, again looks sharp, and a great colour combination of red and navy.
7. France
People love the French strip because it's French. They picture themselves wearing the home jersey while strolling along the Left Bank, wearing a beret, smoking a Gauloise and carrying a ubiquitous baguette under their left arm. It is a nice enough piece of kit and Le Coq Sportif has kept it simple (read, if it was any other country it might be considered a bit boring).
What bugs Rankings enough to keep it at seven is there's one too many cocks on the chest. The new-look, old-school France rugby crest is neat, but looks a bit silly parked next door to a slightly smaller rooster.
Dan says: Hard not to admire this commanding shade of blue with the inclusion of a new stylised red rooster. Super cool.
6. Samoa
This could be a perfect piece of kit, but while the tribal tattoo works perfectly on the home jumper, it lacks a little subtlety on the alternate strip, reminiscent of the garish flag on the sleeve of Team New Zealand's kit in Bermuda. It's a small quibble for BLK to consider though. Samoa Rugby's crest has a lot going on, too.
Dan says: Powerful. How striking does the tatau artwork look? These are jerseys for warriors and chiefs.
5. New Zealand
There's a bit of a love-hate thing going on here with traditionalists not convinced and trendsetters loving it.
The Adidas colab jersey looks like it's designed with crepe paper and you have to wonder why you'd make the most daunting sports garment in the world less intimidating. The alternative is perfectly fine, remembering that nothing will ever sink lower than the atrocious silver number worn circa '07.
The black jersey is the most instantly recognisable piece of footy kit in the world. The team's universal nickname pays homage to the jersey, so it has set a high bar.
Just quietly, throw in the T-shirt neck and this is Ranking's least favourite All Black jersey for some time, which puts it in direct opposition to…
Dan says: Probably the best All Blacks jersey to date with its 3D textured effect designed in collaboration with masterful Japanese designer Yohji Yamamoto for his Y-3 brand. Also great to see some indigenous design work happening here. Like the All Blacks, black will never go out of style.
4. Wales
The last Wales jersey to be produced with Under Armour (for the foreseeable future anyway), so they've gone out with a bit of a bang. Yeah, we at Rankings know that red is just red, but have a closer look and you'll notice a quartered pattern that is fairly bold.
The badge with the sewed-on effect is retro cool and the dark green alternate jersey lifts the whole package. Nice work, Wales.
Dan says: A minimalist yet effective design, the open collar is a nice touch.
3. Argentina
The home jersey is a classic and even if you knew nothing about rugby the country it belongs to is instantly recognisable.
Nike have kept it clean with the home jersey and gone all sorts of radical with the alternate strip, inserting a bold vertical stripe and mixing in different shades of blue and even pink.
If there is a non-lecherous, absolutely in-no-way-sexist way of somehow articulating the fact that Rankings thinks the Argentina home jerseys is possibly the only piece of rugby kit that both sexes look good in, then please send in suggestions.
Dan says: I get it's their classic blue and white stripe, but it's a little dated, even if the fabrics are cutting edge. Their alternative jerseys look more modern and intimidating. Why wouldn't you want to look more modern and intimidating on the field? A retro pastiche.
2. Japan
It took Rankings a while to get his head around this as he was such a fan of the classic cherry and white hoops. You know what, forget it. Rankings is still not quite over it but everybody else seems to just love Canterbury's radical take on a Samurai skin.
Even the alternative jersey has wowed them, so just this once we're bowing to public pressure. The more you keep staring at it, the bolder and more striking it seems – this is a good sign.
Dan says: I like the reference to Samurais with this bold and graphic design. It also reminds me slightly of the Transformers. It's a great example of a uniform that does more on the field to distract or even intimidate the opposition.
1. Italy
Macron got it so wrong with Scotland's alternate jersey but they've got it so right here.
Italy have always had a fantastic kit to distract from their woeful record and it will be no different here. The home jersey is classic blue and borders on minimalist.
The collar is absolutely rugby-perfect and the contrasting blue also makes it interesting. The alternate strip is, in Rankings' eyes, the best jumper at the tourney.
Two strips with different features working in perfect harmony.
Dan Ahwa says: It's true what they say: Italians Do It Better. Here's a kit that has a stylish finesse. It has a great mix of blues and the alternative jersey includes a striking sporty pinstripe in navy against white. Both very modern and crisp.
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