The Tri-Nations trophy (does anyone actually know what this looks like?) is back in the cupboard, and all is well in Rugbyland.
Next assignment. Eeeeek - the World Cup.
Okay, so we're skipping a few things here, like another of those (yawn) magnificent trips to Europe, where the Scary Scots and Welsh Wizards lie in wait.
Not that they need the help right now, but here are a few suggestions for the All Blacks to amp up the campaign to become world champs, and so put this nation out of a dreadful misery.
*Start working on the rolling maul.
This fancy footy is all very well, but Old Blighty and most of the other northern mobs aren't fussed about chucking the ball around when things come to the crunch. The All Blacks might not go into games intending to rumble the ball upfield but they will almost certainly encounter other teams who do, and will have to counter the tactic. Even the Springboks may resort to well-organised mass marches.
The better the All Blacks' total rugby approach works, the more other sides will turn the World Cup into trench warfare. And you can't always fight the heavy artillery with a fancy cavalry. The All Blacks need a strong maul they can rely on, yet this is an area New Zealand rugby doesn't put much emphasis on.
*Give Piri Weepu full games and every game, so he can develop more stamina, and establish - in his mind more than anything - that he is a central commander of this All Black side.
The longer Weepu is on the field, the better the All Blacks are. For all of his combativeness, Jimmy Cowan is a journeyman halfback. The rest of the candidates are to test rugby what budget house-paints are to fine art. As I've said before, Weepu has a touch of the genius Aussie league dummy half Cameron Smith to his game, namely subtleties and a flat pass which create momentum despite the relentless brutality of modern-day rugby. He is a very rare talent and yet you also feel he could be so much more, including when his team is in reverse.
Weepu is a bit of a pudding, and one of those players whose fitness and sharpness are best served by plenty of match action. Take him to the limit and beyond, in other words.
*Start an offensive on the refereeing front.
You can see the forces gathering in far-off lands, ready to scream blue murder about one R. McCaw in particular. This will reach a crescendo before the World Cup, with the Great One accused of everything from stealing candy off small children to bringing down democracy. Rugby has always been a game of cheating - McCaw bends the rules like every other rugby player on the planet. He's just better at it. Even as nippers, we nudged the ball back with our hands, hoping the ref somewhere up there couldn't see us as we struggled for air at the bottom of a ruck. That's a lot of what rugby is - a battle between you and the ref. The rugby world is going to attack McCaw, so the All Blacks need to get in first by poking an accusing finger at David Pocock, Heinrich Brussouw et al. McCaw ain't a perfect, rules-abiding rugby citizen, but neither are they.
*Demand that Dan Carter review his option taking ... this could be a mis-read but there were signs in the Soccer City test that Carter is going on too many combat missions. As former Broncos maestro Wayne Bennett once said about little Alfie Langer, "I don't pay him to hit the ball up." Carter fought for the extra metres last Sunday. But he also left himself exposed. As brilliant as he is, the Cantab playmaker has never shirked the hard stuff. But he's not there to do the dirty work, and the added injury risk isn't worth it. This is no time for unnecessary bravado. Carter needs to conserve his health and energy for creating attacks and essential defensive situations, picking the right moment to run, reading the game, and kicking goals. His All Black comrades need to ensure they spare him from the wrong sort of workload.
*Be cocky and don't fear favouritism.
Fear of failure is what will tie this team in knots. The All Blacks will be short-odds favourites to win, as always, and cop the reminder that the men in black are among sport's most famous chokers. Which of course they are. But that was then, and this is now. Corey Flynn had the right idea when he said the All Blacks had Australia's measure and were ready to stick another one on them during this Tri-Nations. Forget all this Kiwi false modesty rubbish. Think Muhammad Ali - talk tall. The All Blacks don't need murals on aeroplanes, but dreading crash landings won't help either. If the worst comes to the worst, it's not the end of the world. There will be post-mortems and serious hand-wringing, we'll all make sure of that. But that's sport, and the sun will rise again.
*Forget about Sonny Bill Williams. He's an injury-prone and overrated distraction who is already turning into a New Zealand rugby lemon (then again, I'm not brave enough to totally write him off yet).
*Scout around for any more members of the Franks family. There's something very encouraging in that DNA.
<i>Chris Rattue:</i> Seven ways to capture the World Cup
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