KEY POINTS:
A good week for...
The Great White Rise
Of course he'll get a hard time for once again blowing a cast-iron chance to win, but Greg Norman's efforts at the British Open deserve to be saluted. The Aussie legend jumped a record 480 places on the world golf rankings with his bold third-place finish - the biggest single leap in rankings history. He had been ranked 646th in the world before teeing off and soared to No.166. And all in a tournament he was only playing to get his eye in. Good man. So let's stifle those 'choker' accusations.
Tabloid triumph
It's been a good week for fans of puerile tabloid gossip involving Chelsea's highly paid soccer stars as Inter Milan has given up on signing midfielder Frank Lampard and Chelsea in turn has given up on nabbing AC's Kaka. Lampard kept the masses amused with a spot of Las Vegas sauciness last year while renowned prude Kaka attends church and won't touch grog. Fifa's Player of the Year he may be, but a teetotaller who doesn't believe in premarital sex might find the Chelsea dressing room an odd environment.
Braid's bonanza
It's been a helluva a week for Daniel Braid. Three months ago, the specialist opensider would have been justified in considering a European move, what with Richie McCaw seemingly ensconced upon the throne for evermore. Furthermore, just four weeks ago Braid's return to the All Black fold seemed more distant than ever, as Graham Henry announced that specialist opensiders were a thing of the past and we'll play left-and-right thanks very much. One crocked McCaw later and the expertise of a specialist ground-hugging flier is very much back in fashion as the All Black coach has a sudden change of heart. It's irritating enough when Henry rotates his players, but rotating his philosophies is plain out of order.
No-drug pedallers
It's cleaner than ever and there's a Kiwi doing well - what more reason to follow the Tour de France. Julian Dean has grunted his way across the line inside the top 10 three times so far on his fourth Tour. The Kiwi national champion is the only New Zealander in the field and is riding as the designated sprinter for the Garmin Chipotle squad, a new team in the competition. Okay, so he's rubbish going uphill and has had one monster wipe out, but our lad has proven himself as quick as any in the peloton final dash. Expect to see more of him in the next few days as the last mountain stages finished this week. Bon chance, my son!
Eric's sidestep
Great news for Warriors: While other clubs are straining under the pressure of bugger-all income, the teflon-coated Eric Watson appears to have kept his gazzilions free of the car crash that is Hanover Finance.
A bad week for...
League of boozers
Raiders star Todd Carney has sidestepped the law after a complaint that he urinated on a member of the public in a bar following last weekend's victory over the Roosters was withdrawn. But the halfback - whose history of alcohol-related offences makes Jimmy Cowan look like a choirboy - has still been suspended by his club pending an internal investigation. Teammate Bronx Goodwin will face assault charges after allegedly attacking two men outside a bar on the same night.
League of bozzos
More NRL hiccup-hijinks! Kiwis five-eighth Ben Roberts and Bulldogs teammate Lee Te Maari are in trouble again for allegedly fighting at Cronulla's Sting Bar on Sunday night. In February, Te Maari was left unconscious and bleeding in an alleyway after being involved in the same brawl that left Roberts severely concussed and later arrested for resisting arrest, common assault, refusing to comply with a police direction and offensive behaviour.
League of brawlers
But wait, there's more! Five Cowboys under-20 players face suspension following an almighty brawl with the Broncos kiddies on Friday night with five minutes left on the clock.
Cowboys chief executive Peter Parr said: "We don't condone it and we'll be speaking to them but I'd hate to see people jump on the bandwagon about it because it's not immune to just that one game, it's been [going on for] 100 years."
'On my capo-di-capo, son'
Not one of the best weeks for Italian football. The polizia busted seven people on Tuesday in an organised crime ring allegedly trying to buy Lazio football club with laundered money. Three people were still at large in a probe that targeted nine Italians and a Hungarian, who tried to acquire the club through money coming from the illicit activities of the Casalesi clan, a group of the Naples-based Camorra crime syndicate, Rome police said. Among those sought was former Italy and New York Cosmos striker Giorgio Chinaglia.