KEY POINTS:
Come back the New Zealand TAB, all is forgiven.
English bookmakers must surely be flat out holding on to the Scrooge title of laying a book.
Scrolling through the bookies' charts to see what the best odds were about Seachange in the Falmouth Stakes on Wednesday night, you couldn't help but notice a couple of bookies putting up Melbourne and Caulfield Cup charts.
If you can call them that.
It took a little while to reassure yourself that, yes, these were in fact win odds in the Melbourne Cup.
The first 12, that's right 12, horses on one market were $6 or less.
They're kidding, right?
Did someone forget to tell those so-called bag men the race is actually 16-and-a-half weeks away.
And in this column a few weeks ago we had the temerity to "diss" our TAB for its meagre odds on the Kelt Capital Stakes.
By comparison, the Kelt odds are an absolute gift.
The two Australian bookies we ran the Poms' odds by couldn't believe them.
"Those odds must be to run in the first 25, surely," said one.
For the record they are offering: $2.60 Viewed, $4 Boundless, $4.50 Playwright, $4.60 C'est La Guerre, Katy Keen, Roc De Cambes, $5.10 Moatize, $6 Hot Danish, Mission Critical, Pasta Post, Riva San, Weekend Hussler.
That was listed under "win" odds.
They clearly meant "lose" odds.
It's why Pommie bookmakers drive Rolls-Royces and punters ride pushbikes.
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The thought that stakes racing is only a month away helps you to forget this week's weather.
Former Matamata galloper Alamosa is due to make his Australian debut in the A$200,000 ($254,000) Liston Stakes (1400m) in Melbourne on August 16 and the same day we see the $60,000 Foxbridge Plate run at Te Rapa.
Alamosa will do his spring racing from the stable of Mick Price.
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Quote of the week to trainer John Wheeler on the huge bunfight to try and ban jumps racing in Australia.
"There'll always be falls in jumps racing.
"If there wasn't it'd be like Indianapolis with no crashes.
"You may as well sit on the toilet and watch the toilet roll go round and round - it'd be a similar level of excitement."
Wheeler is a major player in the Melbourne jumps scene.
He is not against change in the Australian jumps scene, particularly to the small hurdles, but doesn't believe in listening to the do-gooders among the animal rights activists, who he claims have got it all wrong.
The smaller hurdles were introduced as a direct result of their lobby and have increased the danger levels because horses show them little respect.
It's too early to call and perhaps we shouldn't, but for this column Australian jumps racing to continue is $1.05. There's too much to lose in every direction to can it.
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A decision on whether the penalty phase of the Bernard Dyke betting case will be a formal hearing or done through submissions is likely to be announced by the Judicial Control Authority today.
Cambridge trainer Dyke was last week found by the JCA to have breached the honesty rules of racing in a case relating to Dyke being mistakenly given a betting ticket worth $16,320 that was intended to be $60.
In a defended hearing the JCA declared they had not found Dyke to be a creditable witness.
Dyke and his counsel had until Friday night to provide submissions on the penalty phase and hearing chairman Murray McKechnie will probably announce today whether that will be by a separate hearing or by submissions.
It was indicated there is a strong possibility of Dyke losing his trainers' licence for a period.
