Let the Games begin.
Or make that, let the Fun and Games begin.
As opening ceremonies go, it would be hard to beat the spectacle in Turin, Italy, where the Winter Olympics opened over the weekend.
For a moment - and with famous peace activists helping to carry the Olympic flag - it was possible to forget that behind every good Olympic event lies an even better performance-enhancing drug scandal.
Italy has a head start in stylish and imaginative ceremonies because it can get Sophia Loren and Luciano Pavarotti and Armani on its team, with transport supplied by Ferrari.
And Turin put on a spectacular extravaganza, boosted by having American actress Susan Sarandon also carrying the flag.
Sarandon was perfect for beleaguered Olympic image makers, because she may be the only actress left in Hollywood who hasn't had enhancement of the surgical kind.
But as anyone who followed the slushy dealings, drug and judging scandals at the Salt Lake City Games in 2002 would recall, the Winter Olympics are not as pure as the driven snow.
Far from it.
As long ago as 1968, three East German women luge exponents were biffed out for heating their sled runners.
But we are now in a sporting age where turning your sled into a barbecue would almost rate as roguish fun compared with the widespread drug scandals and cover-ups which go on.
Even before a red Ferrari had burned serious rubber at the opening ceremony, 12 competitors from an array of nations, including Ethiopia (true), had been temporarily barred from competing after returning high red blood-cell counts.
Not all of them may be guilty of using the stamina-aiding EPO, or any other drug. The move to high altitude causes naturally occurring changes to blood. But it would be a major surprise if they were all exonerated, and suspicion will cling to those who are cleared.
These sinister notes behind the power of Pavarotti and Ferrari made for a bizarre and unsettling beginning to the Turin Games, where many of the athletes burst into view wearing futuristic fashion.
So many of them must be true to the ideals of sport, yet - unfortunately - more than just elegant garb cloaked them all. The cheats in sport steal more than just medals. They steal their fellows' reputations.
An American had already been banned after testing positive to a masking agent which he said was in a hair growth stimulant he uses. As is often the American way, Zach Lund invoked God: It was His way of sending Lund a message that bald is beautiful.
For the Winter Olympics' next trick, drug testers have been accused of gaining access to athletes by posing as fans, thus breaching human rights.
The IOC and other authorities are also fudging the truth as they negotiate through the testing procedures.
It will be determined this week whether the high blood-cell counts returned by the banned athletes are due to doping, or whether they have altitude sickness.
And they are not even under suspicion of guilt yet according to the IOC. President Jacques Rogge said: "It is a health test, not a doping test."
An Italian health official, Giovanni Zotta, who claimed athletes had tested positive for EPO, was mistaken, Rogge added. (Zotta is also on the IOC's anti-doping commission.)
The International Skiing Federation (FIS) has joined in, insisting that rather than conducting dope tests and handing out suspensions, it is actually protecting the health of athletes who could be endangered if they competed with thickened blood that can cause clots, etc.
Remarkable really - a skiing organisation telling competitors to slope off for the sake of their health.
If the FIS was really concerned about safety, surely the best thing to do would be to call off the Winter Olympics altogether. Because Winter Olympic sports are not exactly a stroll in the park.
For instance: What is ski jumping if not a dangerous activity? Hurtling through space, having placed your noggin in the bullbars position, is not among the accepted methods of getting the cheapest medical insurance.
Skeleton racing, short-track "demolition derby" speed skating, ice hockey and hell, even figure skating when Tonya Harding was about. None of them is without major dangers.
These IOC "health concerns" are, of course, a holding operation to deal with the time it takes to conduct more tests.
If only the most brilliant of opening ceremonies might have fired enthusiasm, rather than suspicion, before an Olympic Games. But with the Rogge calling for athletes to be clean, and the sound of the enemy rattling the gates ...
For now, the belief must be that we have observed the tip of yet another drugs-in-sport iceberg.
* The sport itself may be a tip of the Winter Olympics iceberg.
There are 2500 athletes in Turin, a drop in the ocean compared with all the hangers-on.
They include 10,000 "sponsors' guests" and 2300 Olympic officials. One commentator described the Games as "drowning in product" and suffering from commercial glut.
Which brings us back to the opening ceremony, where John Lennon's widow Yoko Ono spoke before Lennon's beautiful Imagine was sung by Peter Gabriel.
Imagine no possessions,
I wonder if you can,
No need for greed ...
Wekend high
A spectacular, artistic Winter Olympics opening ceremony in Turin.
Weekend low
The Super 14. A scrappy start - only the Crusaders and Hurricanes, in parts, rose above the dross.
<EM>48 hours:</EM> Rumblings of corruption lurk beneath Games glitz
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