Matt Heath: Sporting city best seen from a hog

Radio host on Radio Hauraki and Herald columnist·NZ Herald·

13 Nov, 2014 08:30 PM3 mins to read

"When I was 15, my Mum threatened to kick me out of the house if I bought a bike. So for me the ride was exhilarating." Photo / Glenn Taylor

Some buddies and I headed over to Melbourne last weekend. The plan was to watch a game at the Melbourne Cricket Ground Friday night and attend Stakes Day at Flemington the next day.

Being Melbourne, there was a lot of going on to be done and a lot of food to be eaten. Add in the distractions of staying at the Crown Casino Hotel, and that doesn't leave much time for sightseeing.

But I like to get my bearings in a city and a great way to do that is on the back of a motorbike. So we booked a ride with Melbourne Harley Tours.

I know what you're thinking: "I don't wanna fang around town with my bits pressed up against some biker's backside!"

Well, you don't have to. You are up on your own seat with your own handles to hold on to.

FROOM ... BUBBUBBUB ... You don't need to be told when a bunch of Harleys pull up in the inner city. They make a lot of noise. So, full of food and drink, we grabbed the provided leather jackets, climbed on our bikes and blasted off around the city.

When I was 15, my Mum threatened to kick me out of the house if I bought a bike. So for me the ride was exhilarating — especially when we hit the motorway. It feels good riding at 100km/h in a deafening Harley convoy.

My guide was a well-spoken, moustached bloke named "Stalk". A man with a wide-ranging knowledge. He answered questions and pointed things out without talking for the hell of it.

We raced across a bridge straddling the Yarra, turned round and went back over and somehow still ended up at Port of Melbourne. We made our way past interesting architecture and then through St Kilda for some music history, before burning round the Melbourne GP Circuit at Albert Park. From the back of a bike you see more than you do in a bus or car.

The next day we went up in a chopper and saw the same stuff again, but from the air. This time we were dangerously full from a feed of braised pork tacos, a life-changing pulled pork quesadilla and locally brewed Sir Veza Pale Ales that all mixed badly with the turbulence above the city.