The taupe pitch looked ripe for runs, on the proviso the first session could be negotiated.
England's pace bowler custodians James Anderson and Stuart Broad, along with debutant Matthew Potts, ensured it couldn't.
Smarting from recent dubious handling by the selectors, the pair steamed in and unleashed contagion on the New Zealand dressing room.
The instruction from the new coach-captain combination of Brendon McCullum and Ben Stokes to play with freedom appeared to release any pent-up tactical confusion.
Jonny Bairstow added to the domination with three catches at third slip as part of a cordon which eventually peaked at five slips and a gully. A leg slip also cameoed at one point.
One can only imagine the rustling of gear bags, crackling of velcro and the clattering of spikes down the visitors' stairwell in the pavilion, past the stoic portrait on Sir Isaac Vivian Alexander Richards and out through the bacon-and-egg tie clad Long Room.
Tellingly, 59 of the first 66 balls leading to drinks were dot balls or wickets. New Zealand's batting was guilty of tentativeness outside off stump, but England's bowling and fielding was sublime.
The Black Caps formed what was effectively a Fibonacci sequence – Will Young 1, Tom Latham 1, Kane Williamson 2, Devon Conway 3. Oh, the relief when Daryl Mitchell moved from five to nine with a rare boundary.
That joy was brief.
The knowledgeable Lord's crowd had just finished their round of applause as New Zealand moved to 27 for four – past their own world record lowest score of 26 from 1955 - when Mitchell chopped on to Potts for 13.
The right-armer also removed Williamson caught behind to Ben Foakes when the captain's soft hands failed him once too often outside off stump.
Potts also bustled through Tom Blundell's stumps for 14.
If there was a solitary consolation for the world champions, at least the scores of their order got progressively higher.