Chris Cairns: "Of course I will burst into tears or feel horrible, but I quickly try to transition out of that. The key things in all of this are choice and purpose." Photo / Chris Cairns, Instagram
Chris Cairns: "Of course I will burst into tears or feel horrible, but I quickly try to transition out of that. The key things in all of this are choice and purpose." Photo / Chris Cairns, Instagram
Cricketing great Chris Cairns has endured a health nightmare of almost unimaginable proportions, particularly for a man who was a prime sports specimen not so long ago.
And yet in an interview revealing the horrific details of the trauma he and his family have been through, along with the painstakingefforts to fight back, the Kiwi sports legend sounds incredibly upbeat.
Cairns suffered a catastrophic heart failure and cancer diagnosis within months of each other, and he is now wheelchair-bound.
It's the toughest of battles for a man who stood up to the world's fastest bowlers in his glittering international career and survived a harrowing court case after it.
His inspiring demeanour in the face of such adversity is, of course, in contrast to some very dark moments, ones he touches on in a lengthy interview with the Between Two Beers podcast.
Cairns knows he may never walk again despite endless hours of rehabilitation, and said from his Canberra home that the hit to his self-worth has left him in tears at times.
Cairns in Canberra in April 2022. Photo / Chris Cairns, Instagram
But as someone who is lucky to even be alive, he is determined to make the most of his second chance.
When asked what his secret is, Cairns told the podcast a simple belief in the power of the mind is carrying him towards a positive future.
"I'm no different from anyone else … there's no secret recipe.
"It's choice, fundamentally. The human race is gifted with an asset in the mind that allows you to choose your reaction to any situation.
"That is the most important thing you possess, and at times people don't tap into that.
"It's easy to be a victim, easier for it to be someone else's fault … to be unlucky.
"I just never carried that mentality. Maybe that was through cricket or other things in my life … that choice aspect is always the most important.
"Of course, I will burst into tears or feel horrible, but I quickly try to transition out of that. The key things in all of this are choice and purpose."
Cairns made for an imposing figure on the field; a six-hitting and fast-bowling Adonis regarded as among the finest all-rounders in cricket history. Now, simply walking again would be a triumph.
Following a tear to a major artery in August, heart surgery led to a spinal stroke that paralysed his legs. Then came a bowel cancer diagnosis requiring Cairns to have a colostomy bag.
Ironically, the colostomy bag is a major bonus.
Chris Cairns in an image posted to Instagram three months after his heart surgery. Photo / Chris Cairns, Instagram
"Spinal injuries do affect bowel and bladder, something that is not talked about enough," he said.
"People don't like hearing about it – it f**ks up your life.
"Self worth … my wife Mel didn't sign up to clean the s**t out of my pants once a week. I wanted to be independent – I would burst into tears.
"Now I've got the colostomy bag, it's actually an upgrade on my lifestyle. I don't need a bowel regime anymore. The beauty is I'm in control.
"I can watch the kids play sport, eat to a limit, have a beer, go out whatever time.
"Even though I'm stuck in a wheelchair, I'm not ruled by that bowel regime which can be devastating."
Cairns has almost no recollection of the day that changed his life.
"I called Mel because I was feeling pretty crook, like a bad hangover," he says of the day he collapsed.
"I had a sleep first, it was lucky that I woke up from that. I tried to go to the toilet, I remember falling down, slurring."
After being rushed to Canberra Hospital, he was turned upside down because his heart could not get blood to his brain. The first surgery went well but then complications led to widespread organ failure.
"The s**t hit the fan - everything was in failure," he says.
"I was on a heart-lung bypass machine - the last-chance saloon."
He was transported to St Vincent's Hospital in Sydney, a renowned heart hospital, where he had two major surgeries.
"They tried to resurrect things, they performed what they call a cabbage - take veins from the shins and put them into your heart," he says.
"That didn't go well, they tried further things, and eventually the heart responded. They pull your chest apart and leave it open, for 24 to 36 hours I think.
"I woke up maybe two days later after that in intensive care, not knowing what the hell had gone on."
Cairns in hospital in April 2022 after undergoing surgery for bowel cancer. Photo / Chris Cairns, Instagram
Cairns said the lack of sleep and "some pretty good drugs" led to bizarre hallucinations.
In one, he believed his wife had gone into business with the famous Hollywood actress Scarlett Johansson. Another time, he thought a fellow patient had placed a sheep's head at the bottom of Cairns' bed.
These are lighter recollections from what was a desperate situation, one that initially left him "quite messed up" emotionally.
"I'm lucky to have got through that and come out the other side … I'm unbelievably lucky to be here … that I'm above ground. That's the biggest blessing at all," he says.
"I have armed myself with knowledge, and Mel is very detailed, a great project manager in what she does. If you understand what you are doing, you are not so reliant on others around you even though you need help to get through this."
Family and his role as CEO of SmartSportz, a startup company involved with the virtual production of live sport, provide the purpose he sees as so vital in life.
He describes the surgeons who operated on him in Canberra - including a Kiwi from Balclutha - as "rock stars".
"To have someone's life in your hands … I'm very fortunate to have met some great surgeons whom I can call friends as well," he says.
Chris Cairns in action during a test match between Australia and New Zealand in Perth on January 1, 1998. Photo / Allsport
"To give you life, so you stay on this planet, and they don't seek the limelight."
His initial rehabilitation involved thousands of little movements to reactivate the neural pathways, while it is now strength-based.
"If I want to stand unaided I have to be strong enough to do that," he says.
Cairns says August 6, the day of his heart failure, is a watershed. Any dramas and controversies before then have paled, overtaken by the positive connections he has made since.
He gave a mighty thank you to the New Zealand Cricket Players Association and its boss, Heath Mills, for their powerful support. He has received uplifting messages from around the cricket world.
"My only words to the New Zealand public are thank you, for the amount of support," he said.
"Home is always special and it keeps you going when you hear what people have been through.
"For me, life is looking forward. Every day is tough, a battle, but it is what it is. I'll be getting up every day, and fighting every day."
