SuperShorts: Sick note

Aberdeen goalkeeper Jamie Langfield is out for up to three weeks after dropping boiling water on his foot while making coffee. He joins a prestigious list of soccer players with daft sick notes:

* Glasgow Rangers defender Kirk Broadfoot burned his face when inspecting two eggs he had just poached in his microwave. One exploded squirting scalding-hot water into his mush.

* Everton goalkeeper Richard Wright was ruled out of an FA Cup fourth-round replay at Chelsea when he ignored a sign warning players not to practise in the goalmouth ... and promptly fell over the sign, twisting his ankle.

* The former Leeds defender Rio Ferdinand strained his knee by having his foot on a coffee table for too long while watching television.

* Former Wimbledon goalkeeper Dave Beasant severed the tendon in his big toe by dropping a bottle of salad cream on his foot.

* Spain goalkeeper Santiago Canizares missed the 2002 World Cup after severing a tendon in his toe by shattering a bottle of aftershave in his hotel bathroom.

* Danish keeper Michael Stensgaard had a career-ending shoulder injury while folding down an ironing board.

* Irish striker Robbie Keane ruptured his knee cartilage after stretching to pick up his TV remote.

* Former Arsenal goalkeeper David Seaman pulled a muscle in his back setting the VCR to tape Coronation Street.

* England midfielder David Batty injured his Achilles tendon when his toddler ran over his foot on a tricycle.

Warrior son

Jarryd Hayne's rich form had our former league writer blowing the dust off his notebook and flipping back through the pages to the Warriors' first taste of NRL action. Hayne's father, Manoa Thompson, ran in the centres for the Warriors in the club's first game back in 1995.

Also on the pitch that day, a young Brisbane Broncos second rower called Brad Thorn.

Dingo's advance

We all try to impress the boss occasionally: turning up on time, staying awake in the office, making the coffee, mowing the bastard's lawn, etc. But shurely Robbie Deans has taken it too far. Dingo was seen in the build-up to last weekend's Springbok test singing "Advance Australia Fair" at the top of his lungs. This from a man whose lips barely moved as he mumbled his way through our own anthem in his All Black playing days! We expect a more subdued rendition tomorrow. ...

Rejection reaction

It's rude to speak ill of the dead and all that, but perhaps the most telling Alex Higgins anecdote stems from his reaction to rejection by a young woman. The Hurricane invited out one of the sponsors' girls who once attended the tobacco-financed World Snooker Championship events. Her "No Thanks, Mr Hurricane" brought a headbutt from the Belfast gent.

Good week for...

Julian Dean

A headbutt from Aussie rival Mark Renshaw and flying tackles from deluded gendarmes couldn't stop the Kiwi cycling ace from completing New Zealand's finest ever Tour de France haul, with three podium finishes.

Bad week for...

Digby Ioane

The Wallaby utility back had his season ended when he tackled his older brother in a game of backyard footy. The hard-hitting 25-year-old was using his sibling Jay as a "tackle bag" in a bid to prove his fitness but damaged his already dodgy shoulder.

The number

40 per cent

The share of Sri Lanka's total test wickets taken by Muttiah Muralathian during his 18-year test career. Never mind the action, look at the smile.