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A good week for ...
It's been a good week for gratuitous references to the most powerful man in the world but Arsene Wenger takes the cake. The Arsenal manager has compared the rise of English players through the youth ranks at Arsenal to that of Barack Obama's ascent to the United States presidency. "I believe that the pride in sport is that if you have the quality you play," says the Professor. "You have the example of Barack Obama in the States - that is one of the countries where, if you have the quality, you will make it."
In championship form - as in relegation to the Championship - just a few weeks ago, the mighty Cockerel have now taken 10 points from their last four league games, with a 2-1 victory at Manchester City. Their form reversal under managerial saviour Harry Redknapp has included an away draw at Arsenal and a league and cup double over previously undefeated Liverpool. The chants of "we're going to win the league" emanating from one Herald sports-writer's desk may, however, be a touch premature. Reports in England claim police investigating accusations of money laundering, fraud and false accounting arising from a two-year inquiry into corruption, are considering new evidence against Redknapp.
England boss Fabio Capello has called for Britain's soccer bodies to help him prepare for retirement by banding together under his generalship for the 2012 Olympics. A united Great Britain team would allow Capello to live out a boyhood dream and give him something to do before his planned Med cruise. "I will be 66 and I will have reached retirement age," Capello said. "Then I want to travel and visit all of the ancient cultures that fascinate me so much. But I would also like to make another of my dreams come true by taking part in the Olympic Games, something that I was denied as a player, and something that still fills me with regret."
Trust the selfish Scots to put national identity ahead of an ageing man's dream. "We will not do anything that we feel would jeopardise our status as a footballing nation in our own right," the Scottish Football Association said in reply to Capello's call for unification. "At some point, there is a real danger that a precedent of a Team GB will come back and threaten our status as a separate nation." A bit like Edward II at Bannockburn, then.
A bad week for ...
Fancy a game of bingo to while away the pre-match coverage leading up to the the All Blacks test against Ireland? Try swigging half your vessel every time some broadcaster pronounces "Ireland" as "Irrrrrrrrrreland". Is it authentic pronunciation? Or was Grant Nisbett born in Southland? And if it is authentic, then why is it they don't pronounce "France" as "Francais"?
First Bjorn Borg's underwear business, now this. Martina Navratilova is to appear in I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here. Happily, George Takei - Mr Sulu from Star Trek - is also in the Pommy jungle show.
It's a terrible week for ex-Waikato stalwarts' credulity. Wales coach Warren Gatland has lamented the absence through injury of Gavin Henson from the Welsh line-up for the autumn tests. "The testament to Gavin Henson as a player is that any time he's started for Wales in a Six Nations game, Wales have won it and I think that's an indication of what sort of player he is." Or it could show how few games he plays.
As if it wasn't bad enough watching his once mighty team getting smashed by India, Australia captain Ricky Ponting also had to fend off accusations he committed the ultimate cricketing sin - taking New Zealand seriously. Pundits and commentators were appalled that Ponting, in the fourth test defeat in Nagpur, had used part-time bowlers at a vital time in an apparent attempt to avoid being suspended for the forthcoming series against the Black Caps because of his team's slow over-rate. "I don't know what to make of all this," former captain Alan Border said while watching Cameron White and Mike Hussey give away 45 runs in six overs. "I am glad Ricky can't read my mind right now because he is not going to like it." Given that Border was commentating live on TV at the time, Ponting didn't need to be telepathic to discover what Border thought of him.