KEY POINTS:
A good week for ...
Good on Fidel Castro for breaking cover when it really counts. The former Cuban President, a comrade of SuperShorts, has leaped to the defence of Angel Valodia Matos, the taekwondo competitor who gave the referee the bash at Beijing. "Astonished by a decision that appeared totally unjust to him, he protested and kicked the referee," Castro, a former basketballer of talent, wrote in a newspaper column. "For our taekwondo athlete and his coach, our total solidarity." Castro blamed Cuba's poor medal haul on the "mafia". And the great man holds little hope for London 2012: "There, there will be European chauvinism, referee corruption, buying of muscles and brains ... and a strong dose of racism."
Vindication of the character-building qualities of South African junior cricket was clear at Trent Bridge. If three months ago you'd told the average English cricket fan their one-day side would be led by the egotistic Kevin Pietersen with semi-retired nutjob Steve Harmison opening the pace attack as Michael Vaughan blubs on the sideline, they'd have assumed their side was sunk. Instead, they nab a 10-wicket victory after bundling out the touring South Africans for 83. Fair play to KP.
After a month of seeing the world champions embarrass themselves by trying to play Fijian running rugby, it was heartwarming to see last weekend's return to the Springbok rugby of old. CJ van der Linde's flying headbutt was certainly a reminder of the halcyon days gone by. Encore!
That's the trouble with rugby: There aren't enough former military coup leaders involved in running the game. Enter Sitiveni Rabuka, the bloke who became Fiji's Prime Minister after leading a coup in 1987, and is now vying to take over management of the national rugby team. He played at prop and captained Fiji in two tests in the 1970s and has SuperShorts' unreserved, though somewhat bemused, backing.
Not to encourage assertions that the boy could someday earn more than Tiger Woods, but SuperShorts hails the great Danny Lee. Korean-born and polished at Rotorua's Springfield Golf Club, Lee has taken Kiwi golf back to the top of the world.
Liverpool fans, it seems, will never walk alone (in an election year). British Sports Minister Andy Burnham has criticised Premier League players for a lack of commitment to their clubs and backed Liverpool fans' efforts to oust the team's American owners. "Clubs have drifted too far from their supporter base ... they need to come back to their roots.
A bad week for ...
Blame Sonny Bill Williams. Former Blues and Fiji winger Rupeni Caucaunibuca has walked out on his French club to enter negotiations with Leicester in England. Caucaunibuca, who once had the world at his feet, was labelled a disgrace by his clubmate Sireli Bobo. "He is a disgrace to all the Fijian players who have made their mark in the elite French competition," Bobo said. "We are disappointed and at the same time embarrassed with his attitude."
The insularity of the US comes to the "fore!" once again. International golfers on the US LPGA tour have been told they must speak English or bugger off. From next year, players who have been on the tour for two years face suspension if they can't pass an oral evaluation of English skills. The tour has 121 international players from 26 countries - 45 of whom are South Koreans.
Kate Peters, executive director of the LPGA State Farm Classic, explains it thus: "This is an American tour. It is important for sponsors to be able to interact with players and have a positive experience."
Beatrice Faumuina - for crying out loud - stop complaining about not being loved and not being allowed to fly home from Beijing on your own. Public relations - like discus - is a simple game. Throw that bloody plate a long way and the punters will love you.
It's been a bad week for brothels in Madrid. Cristiano Ronaldo's transfer from Manchester United is officially off.
Here's where it all starts to go wrong for Fabio Capello. Steven Gerrard is out of England's first World Cup qualifiers after a groin operation. That'll be Rafa Benitez's welcoming present to England manager Capello. Gerrard went under the knife overnight. Mark it in your diary, September 6: England v Andorra.