Richard Boock: Singh squirms to defend the indefensible

Vijay Singh hopes Annika Sorenstam misses the cut in next week's Colonial tournament so he won't be beaten by a woman, as if there could be no worse fate on the planet.

The man who was once carpeted for changing his already-signed scorecard has spent the past couple of days trying to justify his stance. In the absence of any better reasoning, he descended to a pitiful "she doesn't belong on the tour" jibe, just a dishcloth away from suggesting the Swede should go back to the kitchen and concentrate on the washing up.

You get the feeling that if Sorenstam had qualified for the tournament, like Babe Zaharias in 1945, Singh would have still been looking for reasons to object, possibly suggesting that her breasts could be unfairly used as sighting equipment.

He was jumping all over the place trying to justify himself this week, splitting hairs over what he initially said before summing up his opposition with: "This is a man's tour. There are guys out there trying to make a living. It's not a ladies' tour."

Right. I think we understand, Vijay. It doesn't matter that Sorenstam is entering on a sponsor's exemption, and could just as easily be someone completely irrelevant like Michael Jordan or Bo Jackson.

It's the fact she is a woman. She may play golf and play it well; she may be head and shoulders ahead of her own LPGA rivals, but when all is boiled down she still isn't a chap.

And in the world of Vijay Singh, chaps only play with chaps.

It's a guy thing.

With that in mind, it's perhaps time someone pointed out to Singh that if anything is threatening the traditions of the testosterone-laced PGA these days, it is not Sorenstam but his own less-than-manly outbursts.

There are few things quite so pathetic as a man who finds fame and fortune in a specific pursuit and then tries to undermine the efforts of a new face - as if his own deeds were somehow under threat.

What harm could possibly arise from Sorenstam's participation? Well, there are the deep psychological scars that would be inflicted on any bloke she finishes ahead of, the danger of red-blooded rivals being distracted, - and, of course, the main concern: having to provide a separate changing room.

It brings to mind the time New Zealand cricketer Mark Richardson tested the water with Brian Lara at Carisbrook, not long after the West Indian star had been dismissed in a festival game by Australian women's representative Zoe Goss.

As Lara was facing up to Otago paceman Evan Marshall, Richardson urged the bowler on by yelling "C'mon Zoe," a remark that so incensed the West Indian that he sledged its maker viciously for the rest of the game.

As it happened, Richardson had the last laugh, making a century.

But how Lara, who was then without peer in international cricket, could have felt so insecure about being dismissed by Goss in a charity game was possibly the bigger issue.

He had not long before smashed the world test record with an innings of 375, and had followed up with a modest 501 in a county game for Warwickshire, cementing his name forever in cricket folklore.

Maybe Singh understands.