Watching the world's best golfers battle the treacherous conditions at the British Open at Turnberry over the weekend, I was reminded of that famous golfing quote: "A major golf tournament is 40,000 sadists watching 144 masochists".
It's a line often repeated by golf commentators, usually when some poor bloke is
fossicking around in the rough for his ball, or when he hits it into the drink. A quick Google search reveals the quote originated from American sports writer and golfing oracle Thomas Boswell back in 1974.
Boswell forgot to mention, though, that the biggest sadist of all has to be the evil critter who designed the unforgiving Turnberry course. Again, a quick Google search tells me the sicko's name is Mackenzie Ross, a golf-course architect who in 1951 redesigned the Ailsa to create the spectacular links course seen today.
Whether through the use of the narrowest of fairways with bunkers either side, or a long carry over the rocks to reach a distant target, this guy is responsible for the hours of unremitting humiliation this year's field has endured day after day.
Over the past few days we've seen golfers subjected to the indignity of enlisting the help of the gallery to search for a ball lost in the rough (and when I say "the rough", I of course mean the metre-long tussock that lines the fairways), hooked tee shots landing on the rugged shoreline of the firth and plenty of wayward shots being swallowed up by the deep pot bunkers.
But Ross has also ensured - and this could be the sadist in me talking here - an enthralling contest.
How refreshing has it been to see the golfers face a true test of the elements, where the emphasis is placed on well-thought-out and accurate shot-making over strength and power?
On an everyday tournament course on the PGA and European tours, the longer, stronger hitters rule the fairways. But on the Open links at Turnberry such attributes as experience and cunning come into their own in a big way.
It has proven the perfect stage for 59-year-old Tom Watson of the United States.
The "golfing wrinkly", as he is called in some quarters, was on the verge of landing his sixth Open title, 34 years after securing his first, though in the end he just missed out in a play-off last night.
Watson's billing as the "King of the Links" was evident from the opening day of the tournament, as he displayed mastery of the ball not just in the air, but along the bumpy, lying surfaces.
His performance is all the more remarkable when you consider whom the course has dismissed from its presence: Paul Lawrie, Ben Curtis, Sir Nick Faldo, David Duval, Todd Hamilton - all younger, all Open winners. Even world No 1 Tiger Woods couldn't make it beyond the opening rounds, missing the cut for just the second time in his career. (I bet the guy dressed up in the tiger suit who had been following Woods around was peeved that he'd paid for the costume for the entire four days.)
If Watson, the third-round leader, can go on to triumph overnight it will be one of the most heartwarming, barely credible sporting tales of our time.
In what other sporting setting could you have a competitor who is pushing 60 and lugging around a replacement hip, leading the way?
But regardless of whether he lifts the Claret Jug in the early hours of the morning, Watson has shown, just as 53-year-old Greg Norman did last year when he nearly pulled off an unlikely victory at Birkdale, that golf can truly be a game for everyone.
After all, there is no age limit to masochism.
While we're on the subject of masochists, the most enduring of them all would have to be fans of the South Sydney Rabbitohs. It is fair to say the Bunnies' supporters have had a tough few decades. So it is nice to see the team with the unfortunate uniforms once again pushing for a playoff position after ending a 20-year drought against the Broncos at Suncorp over the weekend.
Their 44-12 win over the Broncos was the first time they had beaten the Brisbane side at Suncorp since 1989. That's one heck of a dry spell.
To put it in perspective, back in 1989 Russell Crowe was still performing as a rock 'n' roll revivalist under the stage name "Russ le Roq", with the highlight of his acting career being a brief stint on Neighbours.
Big Russ must be beside himself with joy following his side's latest win. It comes after many had claimed the Rabbitohs seventh-place finish last year was just a false dawn for the club.
This 32-point win over the Broncos puts the Bunnies back within striking distance of the top eight.
If you want to talk droughts, though, how about England's 75-year hoodoo against Australia at Lord's? It must be particularly grating for the English that victory has proved so elusive on their own hallowed turf.
After 75 years, England now finally have a sniff of victory at Lord's with a seemingly impregnable position in the second Ashes test.
Ironically, it looks as if only rain could extend their drought from here.
Watching the world's best golfers battle the treacherous conditions at the British Open at Turnberry over the weekend, I was reminded of that famous golfing quote: "A major golf tournament is 40,000 sadists watching 144 masochists".
It's a line often repeated by golf commentators, usually when some poor bloke is
AdvertisementAdvertise with NZME.