The Wallabies would surely love more chances to break their Eden Park hoodoo. Photo / Photosport
The Wallabies would surely love more chances to break their Eden Park hoodoo. Photo / Photosport
OPINION:
1. Familiarity breeds contempt
There wasn't, admittedly, much contempt on display at Eden Park over the weekend.
The All Blacks and Wallabies did all their huffing and puffing the previous week in Melbourne - Rieko Ioane didn't even seem that mad about Australia playing a bit of boomerang duringthe haka on Saturday night.
And the following afternoon, between the sun, the lack of stakes and Winston Reid's farewell, the All Whites-Socceroos clash met the definition of a friendly.
But as the fallout from the first Bledisloe Cup test did show, the two nations contesting regular fixtures only strengthens the inherent rivalry.
Minor gripes, like haka responses or foul play on the pitch will, over time, escalate into major grievances which, if we're being honest, is what we want from sport.
Think of watching David Warner celebrate a century. The first time, all the jumping and pumping is a bit naff. The second time, it's like, seriously? This guy again? The third time, you're ready to declare a holy war.
In the future, in a perfect world, every code will have its version of Warner making a dick of himself.
Rival football fans pose for a photo at Eden Park. Photo / Photosport
2. Invite neighbours to the party
As 1 News big dog Guy Heveldt tweeted last week, every big sport should have annual transtasman fixtures and organisers should group together the codes to make a festival of the whole thing.
Imagine a winter weekend in Sydney or Auckland. Friday night, a league double-header featuring the Jillaroos and Kangaroos facing off with the Kiwi Ferns and Kiwis. Saturday, it's rugby's turn, with the Black Ferns and All Blacks taking on their counterparts. Then, on Sunday afternoon, we finish with some football.
Six months later, do it all again with summer sports - cricket, hockey, basketball - on the other side of the ditch, with the host country alternating every year.
Other sports can join the party, but the chief aim is making it a party. Offer ticket bundles to the matches. Get Kiwi and Aussie musical acts to perform. Invite Russell Crowe to oversee the festivities.
Sounds like fun and sounds like the type of occasion that would attract fans to travel across the Tasman for a long weekend of high-quality sport, further fostering the rivalries.
3. Bragging rights
Any supporter of any team with a genuine rival will say the same: beating that opponent is nice, but being able to talk shit about beating that opponent is even nicer.
No one is above such pettiness. Even my mum - the type of person who feels pity for the opposition if her team are winning too well - was compelled to point out at Eden Park on Sunday that the Australians near us were celebrating their goals a bit too enthusiastically for her liking.
It's just human nature, and by now there has - unfortunately? - been enough cross-contamination between the countries that most everyone knows an Aussie and vice versa. They've infected our lives and we've enriched theirs.
Trust me, there's no better way to enjoy a victory than telling those cobbers all about it, reliving with vivid description New Zealand's incredible highs and analysing in forensic detail Australia's embarrassing lows.
4. We need the practise
There may be no player Black Caps fans more enjoy seeing dismissed than David Warner. Photo / Photosport
Whether there's any truth to the theory the Black Caps have a mental block about beating Australia in Australia - having failed to do so since Hobart 2011 - it's pretty obvious they need more practise.
This month's Chappell-Hadlee series confirmed that even an Australian side featuring few world-class players are more than capable of dishing out a hiding - the only concern/consolation is that it won't happen again until at least 2027.
That's not gonna assist the Black Caps in ending any hoodoo, just like the All Whites are never gonna close the evident gap in quality between the nations when they can so rarely test themselves.
The dearth in football fixtures was caused by the Socceroos escaping to join Asia and was reinforced by the All Whites' inability to follow them like a creepy ex.
But it's clear that beating up on the Oceania nations is hardly aiding the All Whites' progress; a regular match against even domestic-based Australian players would be much more beneficial.
On the other hand, playing here every year hasn't exactly helped the Wallabies.
5. They're there
Time for a geography lesson. New Zealand and Australia are really far away from everything else, and that includes worthy sporting competition.
With respect to our island neighbours, who could most certainly destroy us with more resources and less poaching, it's tough to find a good game nearby.
And now for a science lesson: the climate is worsening and, as big-brained radio personalities will kindly explain, flying is contributing to that.
So the fact we have a natural sporting rival just a ditch away must be capitalised on, for the planet you see.
When asked why he had climbed the world's highest mountain, a great Kiwi athlete once replied: because it's there.
Why should our teams play regular games against Australia? Because they're there. It needn't be more complicated than that.
