From the stupendously handsome to the merely tremendously talented, the football World Cup is always a spectacle.
From the stupendously handsome to the merely tremendously talented, the football World Cup is always a spectacle.
64 games, a feast of cliches and preening superstars. Yes, the quadrennial extravaganza that is the football World Cup finals is underway in Russia. Here’s Chris Reed's bluffer’s guide.
WHAT'S IT LIKE TO SCORE A GOAL?
He might not have scored at the World Cup finals, but it was the next best thing.
Rory Fallon is adamant it was "destiny" that he scored the goal to win the playoff that took the All Whites to the 2010 finals in South Africa.
Fallon jumped powerfully to head a looping, outswinging corner between the keeper and a defender with halftime looming in the second leg of the playoff against Bahrain in Wellington nine years ago. The All Whites won the tie 1-0.
"It comes down to instinct," he said this week. "You have a split-second to decide what to do. You have to have confidence in yourself, that you are fit enough, strong enough and trust in your training."
Try it.
Go to the park with some friends. Get one of them to kick a football at you really, really hard while the others jostle you.
Regardless of where it's aimed, the ball may not travel towards your foot. It could arrive at head-, chest- or waist-height.
That might not be the kicker's fault. The ball could bobble on the grass as they kick it. If it's kicked along the ground, it may deviate from the intended path en route. If it's aerial, for some or all of the time, wind may alter the trajectory.
As the ball approaches, the jostling may have escalated to grappling, or worse.
If you have the physical – and mental – strength to withstand it, you have to play the ball. Will you try to stop it dead on the ground? Or will you make contact with the right power and directional nous to ensure it goes where you intend?
You've got almost no time to decide. A 2007 study by a sports scientist in the UK found professional players sent the ball at an average 30 metres per second, or 108km/h.
Each outfield player in Russia will contend with that scenario, sometimes scores of times each match. And that's only when their side is in possession. When it's not, they will face another set of variables.
Rory Fallon has dined out on this moment for years. And rightly so. Photo / NZPA
Even when they're in possession, they're not. Unlike, say rugby, where you clutch the ball tightly to you, in football it's always apart, however slightly, always subject to other factors.
And if they shoot, chest or head towards goal, there's the presence of the keeper to consider, a keeper who will almost certainly be very tall and very agile.
That's why a sport with the simplest of foundations – get the ball in the goal - is so maddeningly hard.
Fallon, now 36, scored 86 club goals in 288 starting and 174 substitute appearances with a string of professional clubs in the UK.
He scored six times for New Zealand, including the one against Bahrain, and played in all three games at the 2010 finals. After battling serious injury, he was recalled to the squad that failed to qualify for Russia in a playoff against Peru.
Even now, retired from all football and taking a break from the game, he talks about the Peru tie with regret, with a belief the All Whites could have won.
Fallon reckons mental strength is the key attribute for the best players, the ability to shake off the disappointment of a bad touch or mistake.
He thrived on the pressure that came with playing in front of a big crowd at an important match - it was on less-important occasions that he sometimes struggled.
Fallon has professional coaching qualifications so can return to football. But he's happy building up the Cowlick Creamery, the artisan ice cream business he runs with wife Carly.
Based in Plymouth, in England's south-west, they make "high-end ice cream for high-end restaurants". The warm UK summer is putting pressure on production.
Fallon thinks Germany will win the World Cup. As a boy he always followed Argentina. This year, he'll take most interest in Iceland. A mate plays for them and he likes that they're punching above their weight, as New Zealand did in 2010.
"The goal is like a dream now, but it's something I'll never forget. You wait your whole life for stages like that. You need to make the most of them."
Football is big with the ladies in Peru. Here they are in Wellington ahead of the qualifying match between their boys and New Zealand at Westpac Stadium in November 2017. Photo / Mark Mitchell
While New Zealand might not be in Russia, Fallon had some impact on the 2018 World Cup. He scored the All Whites' second in a 3-1 win over Fiji during the qualifying tournament in 2016.
HOW DO THEY PLAY?
Most teams at the finals use variations on a 4-2-3-1 formation.
This has replaced 4-4-2 as the most-popular in world football. The change is because managers want more men in the middle of the field in an attempt to control the game.
The numbers signify a row of four defenders in front of the goalkeeper, two defensively minded midfielders, three more attack-minded midfielders and a lone striker.
The basic 4-2-3-1 formation has multiple variations.
Sometimes the coach will instruct his fullbacks – the two defenders at either end of the back four - to push forward to support attacks. More conservative managers will insist they stay back.
Sometimes two of the three more attack-minded midfielders will play out wide, one on each side. Other times, they'll play more in the centre.
Sometimes they'll be wide when their team is in possession, to offer an attacking outlet, but more central when they're not.
The lone striker will sometimes be asked to drop back into midfield when his team is not in possession to help regain the ball.
In the bulk of the matches, expect few goals and a congested midfield. Many opponents will be relatively evenly matched and play similar formations. Managers will want to keep the scoreline tight and avoid defeat, with conservative football the end result.
Many lower-ranked teams will be unadventurous. The bulk of their players will stay in more defensive areas. They will hope their technical limitations will be offset by discipline and organisation. Even the most gifted attacking teams can be thwarted by resolute defending.
In games with one particularly defensive side, you will see lots of action around their defence. This will leave the attacking team susceptible to the counter-attack.
Progressive coaches of the best teams, for example Germany's Joachim Low, will vary their formation depending on the formation and sometimes within the same game.
Ronaldo is one of the most humble players ever to grace the football field. Photo / AP
The Scandinavian participants – Sweden, Denmark and Iceland – typically play a more traditional formation of 4-4-2 based around direct, sometimes long passes. Portugal's 4-4-2 is relatively defensive but offset by the incredible counter-attacking talent of Ronaldo and his fellow forwards.
Poland and Belgium have tended towards playing three defenders. This gives them more attacking power but makes them defensively weaker. It's a tactic likely to work best against defensive opponents.
Spain still favours the 4-3-3 formation that allows them to dominate possession and which has brought them so much success this century.
Perfected at Barcelona and once described as tiki-taka, the term is somewhat out of favour after becoming a synonym for over-intricate passing with no end product.
Neymar's knees get cold when he plays outside of his native Brazil. Photo / Aflo Sport
Brazil's formation has evolved from 4-4-2 to 4-3-3. Like Spain, possession is key but their primary attacking threat comes when the wide men, including Neymar, drive inside at pace, with or without the ball rather than crossing it into the penalty area from the edge of the pitch. This forces defenders to move quickly and disrupts the organisation of the defence.
WHY ARE BRAZIL SO GOOD?
Brazil have a record five World Cup titles and are favourites in Russia.
As a boy, their greatest-ever player Pele used a sock stuffed with paper for a ball. Current striker Gabriel Jesus' first organised games were on dirt pitches.
Obviously the best players have innate mental talent – spatial awareness, the ability to process information and make decisions faster than those who will never reach the elite level.
But many skills, particularly physical, can be learnt or honed.
Jesus' childhood coach, José Francisco Mamede, told the Guardian last year that playing on dirt aids the speed of decision-making.
"He needs to be able to predict where the ball is going to arrive and where it's going after he makes the pass. So he's going to develop much better control than if he just plays on artificial turf. I think this is very important."
Enrico Meirelles, who coached at top Brazilian club side CR Vasco da Gama before moving to New Zealand nine years ago, said football culture is huge in his homeland.
Enrico Meirelles.
"We grow up living and breathing football. As a kid you will always get a football or football gear as presents. Parents and families want their kids to do well in football as it can change the lives of the whole family. Pretty much any kid will say they want to be a famous footballer when they grow up."
Meirelles, who has worked with players such as Philippe Coutinho, now with Barcelona, reckons playing in the street and on the dirt is a key factor in Brazil's sustained success.
"We play football every day - before school, in breaks and after school - any place to play football is okay. In cities like Rio we have a big population and a lot of poverty, it's not easy to find a field or a gym to play in so people play wherever they can.
"As a kid I would play for five hours straight with friends with no adults involved. If we didn't have a ball, we'd play with a can, a pair of rolled up socks, a lid of a bottle - anything! This helped improve our skills."
Meirelles is now head coach and chief executive of the Wellington-based Samba Futsal Academy. Futsal is an indoor five-a-side game played on a court with a smaller ball than used outside in 11-a-side football. It is played with touchline boundaries.
Taking your top off is vital in street football. Photo / 123RF
He said Neymar, Ronaldo, Messi and more all developed their skills playing futsal as children. It's faster than football and players get more touches - improving technical ability and decision-making.
"Thirteen of the 23 players in the Brazilian team going to Russia were playing for professional futsal clubs when they were younger."
Neymar, who should inherit the mantle of world's best once Messi and Ronaldo finally retire, has exquisite balance and is physically fast. His ability to play in advanced, wide positions then burst into space is key to his game.
But he has a drive to succeed as well. The backgrounds of all the game's mononymous superstars suggest the commonality of obsession. As kids they wanted to do nothing but play football. Often that obsession was in tandem, or perhaps because of, humble, or even impoverished circumstances.
"As most of them came from poor backgrounds, the family gives everything to them to turn into a football player and help the family after," said Meirelles. "Some of them even don't have anything to eat. I think this makes them more strong and fight for a better life."
Brazil play: Switzerland (June 18, 6am), Costa Rica (June 22/23, midnight) and Serbia (June 28, 6am). All times NZ.
AND WHY ARE ENGLAND SO ... UNDERACHIEVING?
You can only underachieve if expectation outstrips performance, and there is nothing to justify expectation of English success.
England have a largely wretched record at international tournaments. Their only victory was at the 1966 World Cup when they played at home and had the benefit of a controversial refereeing decision at a crucial time in the final.
England have dined out on this moment for longer than Rory Fallon has been alive. Photo / AP
Since then, they have often aced qualifying groups only to come unstuck on the big stage.
Common criticisms include uninspiring managers with a lack of tactical nous compared to the world's best, players who appear to care more about their club career and a complacency embodied by the national governing body and emboldened by the jingoistic press. Their record in high-pressure knockout games is poor, particularly if they go to penalty shootouts.
Current manager Gareth Southgate had one club job before joining the England set-up. In a little over three years at Middlesbrough, he had a win percentage of 30 per cent and oversaw their relegation from the Premier League. After joining England he steered the Under 21s to the 2015 European Championship finals where they finished bottom of their group. He has a record of 10 wins and six draws in 18 games in charge of the senior team.
England have a young squad that should get them out of their group in Russia. They would likely face Poland or Colombia in the final 16 where temperament will approach the importance of talent.
England play: Tunisia (June 19, 6am), Panama (June 24/5, midnight) and Belgium (June 29, 6am). All times NZ.
VAR: After trials in various competitions, with varying degrees of success, the Video Assistant Referee system will be used in all 64 games in Russia.
Fifa wants it to correct "clear and obvious" errors by referees in four key situations – the build-up to goals, penalty claims, sending-offs and cases of mistaken identities.
We're all for VAR technology as long as it doesn't mean an end to exaggerated facial expressions. Photo / 123RF
A team of officials with access to 33 broadcast and two offside cameras will be based at a room in Moscow, a bit like the Bunker in the NRL.
Footage from two additional cameras will be available during the knockout phase.
If they identify a problem in any of the key situations, they can alert the on-field referee. He can accept the error or review footage on a screen by the pitch. The VAR team cannot overrule the referee.
One survey found the VAR trials increased the accuracy of refereeing decisions to almost 99 per cent. Critics claim it stops the flow of the game and creates inconsistencies from match to match – the interpretation of one VAR team may differ from that of another.
Bad fans: There will be particular scrutiny of fan behaviour. Russia fans are notorious for racism and violence.
A new report by the Fare network and Sova Center on discrimination in Russian football during the last domestic season found a sharp increase in the number of discriminatory chants, including monkey chants at black players, and a rise in the number of homophobic displays.
Russian fans are not famous for their fair-minded and neutral stance to the full cross section of the footballing community. Photo / 123RF
Russian authorities have already told known hooligans they won't tolerate violence. President Vladimir Putin was instrumental in bringing the event to Russia and won't want to be embarrassed.
The head of Fifa, Gianni Infantino, said this week there still risks of racism and riots.
WHO SHOULD I SUPPORT?
Let's assume you're not too bothered about backing Australia. If you want a plucky underdog story, what about Iceland? Compared by Rory Fallon to the New Zealand side that made the finals in 2010, Iceland are more than the sum of their parts.
Despite a population of 350,000, they reached the quarter-finals of Euro 2016, beating England on the way.
Their fans are best known for the scary Viking Thunderclap - hands above head, clap, slowly at first then increasingly faster. Sounds silly - but done by thousands of bearded blokes, it's very offputting.
If that all sounds a bit chilly, what about Nigeria? The Super Eagles are hoping to soar again after a rough patch. They reached the knockout phase twice in the 1990s but have done little since.
They've got a tough group, which includes Iceland, but have already won the fashion battle. Their World Cup kit sold out globally the day it was released, with long queues outside London's flagship Nike store.
If you're an All Blacks fan and can't bear the prospect of anything but winning, there are few realistic options.
Despite the high rankings of Switzerland, Poland, Peru and more, there are only a handful of realistic winners.
Brazil are favourites - and will be eager to bounce back from their 7-1 mauling at the feet of Germany at the 2014 World Cup. The Germans are close second favourites. They have such a talented squad they could afford to leave out Leroy Sane, the English Premier League's young player of the year. The winner will probably be one of these.
Spain are a chance, if they can overcome the sacking of their coach Julen Lopetegui on the eve of the tournament. He was fired for accepting the job of Real Madrid manager next season without telling his current bosses.
Argentina and Nigeria insist on playing each other at every World Cup. Photo / 123RF
Argentina still appeal to many, but Messi has failed to replicate his best club performances at the World Cup and they have problems at the back, particularly in goal.
Despite Ronaldo, Portugal are probably not strong enough at the back. And the same goes for world number three Belgium, although they could blow away a few teams with their talented attacking players.
WHAT ARE THE MUST-SEE MATCHES? (all NZ kick-off times, all 6am unless stated)
Today (June 16) Portugal v Spain: Iberian derby enlivened by shock sacking of Spain coach Julen Lopetegui. France v Australia (10pm): The French have serious attacking talent. Could get embarrassing for our chums across the Tasman.
Monday, June 18 Brazil v Switzerland: First chance to see Neymar and the favourites against a stolid Swiss team sixth in the world rankings.
Tuesday, June 19 Tunisia v England: The English press are already in build-em-up mode. The knock-em-down phase could start here. The Africans aren't bad.
Friday, June 22 Argentina v Croatia: Could be a corker. Both sides are strong in attack, less so at the back. Croatia's Modric needs to equal Messi's influence for an ageing Argentina.
Monday, June 25 Poland v Colombia: Two teams with higher rankings than you might expect. Poland love scoring. Colombia can be expansive.
Tuesday, June 26 2am - Uruguay v Russia: Luis Suarez will look to get his teeth into Russia's creaky defence.
Wednesday, June 27 Nigeria v Argentina: The Super Eagles may feel they're due a win after losing to Argentina at all three previous visits to the finals.
Thursday, June 28 Serbia v Brazil: The Balkans are no slouches. Brazil might already have qualified for the knockout phase by this point and could be susceptible to a shock.
Friday, June 29 England v Belgium: The big one in group G. A team packed with some of the best talent in the English Premier League. Against England.
