If fans are told often enough that what they’re paying to watch doesn’t really matter, that what really matters is a seven-week tournament every four years, they’ll believe it. And the delivery of that self-defeating message sounds stronger than ever.
2. Putting the regular in regular season
Super Rugby drives that message on a weekly basis, especially in its much and deservedly maligned format.
Eight of 12 teams making the playoffs simply encourages supporters to switch off for the first three months or so.
After all, why bother paying close attention when all that’s being determined is which four bad teams will be weeded out?
More weeding is needed. Last year the Highlanders booked the eighth and final postseason berth with a 4-10 record. No self-respecting gardener is allowing something so unseemly to remain alive.
To randomly choose another team to prove the folly of the format, this year’s Highlanders started the season by shipping 140 points in three games and saw their playoff chances basically unaffected.
Super Rugby currently offers what amounts to a 15-round warm-up. Home advantage and seedings are being determined, but even those prizes feel unimportant. A trip to Sky Stadium is hardly akin to Ellis Park.
3. Too much R&R
Setting aside derbies, are there any Super Rugby fixtures that will pique the interest of an average Kiwi fan?
A (somewhat flimsy) argument could be made for Crusaders-Brumbies: two consistently quality teams; a bit of history after contesting a few finals; stars aplenty on both sides.
But any opportunity to manufacture hype for the most recent clash was quashed before the Brumbies stepped on the plane, with Wallabies Nic White, Pete Samu, James Slipper and Rob Valetini all rested. Defeat was essentially conceded, the bullets saved for when there was more chance of hitting the target.
The Brumbies are of course not alone. With the looming World Cup, you may remember, the Only Thing That Matters, coaches are forced to pick and choose when to rest their best.
You can’t blame Stephen Larkham for looking at a visit to Christchurch — where his side have not won since 2000 — and deciding to take the L. Just like you can’t blame anyone for shrugging their shoulders and finding something else to watch.
4. Winning the battle
Viewers who skipped the Crusaders’ comfortable victory could, for example, have chosen to watch some league later that night.
It was easy to forget the Broncos’ tense win over the Dolphins was the first Battle of Brisbane. The passion both on the field and in the sold-out Suncorp Stadium stands could have evidenced a rivalry spanning generations.
Rugby should experience great envy about such an occasion. Not merely for the 50,000 paying customers but for the instant rivalry born between Brisbane’s NRL teams.
Auckland’s two Super Rugby teams also played that weekend. Needless to say, there weren’t quite as many watching Moana Pasifika thrashed by the Hurricanes at Mt Smart or the Blues edging the Force at Eden Park.
Nor has there been any indication that Blues-Moana Pasifika could ever resemble a rivalry. But that doesn’t make it any different from the other all-Kiwi clashes.
Battle of the Bombays is a cute name; that’s about it. There’s no animosity between the players and the idea of bragging rights among fans is literally a foreign concept.
Rivalries imbue otherwise average matches with meaning. Remove them and you’re left with average matches.
5. It’s their year
At last, we reach the one true reason that rugby is, like Daryl Hannah near the end of Kill Bill: Volume 2, losing eyeballs — who could possibly look away from the Warriors?
The Warriors, when playing like this, supply a supporter experience unrivalled in New Zealand sport. No one can match the emotional swings provided by a team equally determined to construct for themselves an early hurdle as they are in exhibiting the quality to then overcome it.
When they’re delivering that kind of entertainment, it doesn’t matter if it’s really their year (probably not, the NRL is hard). What matters is their games now matter.
There’s no dictatorial force telling them they can’t play their best players — and no desire for fans to hit the snooze button until we get to September.
The Warriors and rugby league should win the battle for eyeballs, because at least they’re trying to.
