KEY POINTS:
Had Star Trek's Dr McCoy been a fan he might have said to Captain Kirk, "it's cricket Jim, but not as we know it" after a week like no other in the history of the game
The Indian Premier League auction this week had the whiff of sleaze
about it. It doesn't take much imagination to picture the horde of Bollywood and business tycoons slavering over the prime cattle on offer in Mumbai.
The players won't complain, although Australian captain Ricky Ponting will have a pithy view on his value when the hammer came down at only - only - US$450,000 a year for the world's best batsman.
Altogether 78 of the game's best players were bought for a batch of Twenty20 games next month and for the next two years.
Here's one view of what took place: "I have never seen anything so riveting, so absorbing and so exciting, even on the field. It's amazing drama."
Before you reach for the bucket, you should know that stomach-churning nonsense came from Inderjit Singh Bindra, a heavyweight Indian official who happens to be co-founder of the IPL. As the players rejoice at their good fortune to be pocketing truckloads of cash, they would be wise to ponder what might lie ahead. Not the handful of three-hour bashes, but the fact that they are property, which can be bought and sold, traded and profited from.
Old players, and some not so old, will have been shaking their heads this week at what the game has become. Some will curse the unfortunate timing of their birth; others wonder what's become of the game they know and love.
And as New Zealand Cricket and the players tiptoe their way through a minefield over where players should be when events clash, don't blame the workers. They have been offered the chance of financial security for life. That's life and good luck to them.
Here's the rub, or one of them. The Indian board, organisers of the IPL, have insisted they won't interfere with "international" commitments but will want value for their franchises' money.
ICC chief executive Malcolm Speed was in fawning mode this week, delighting in the "absolute priority" India will give to tests and ODIs instead of the IPL.
The key word is "international". Had it been "national team commitments", NZC, instead of contemplating its top three players, including its captain, missing the start of next month's tour of England, could have argued they should be on tour from day one.
Negotiations are still to be finalised between NZC and the players, Daniel Vettori, Jacob Oram and Brendon McCullum. Other countries will watch the outcome. Their turn is coming.
IPL does not have a window in the ICC calendar. That would solve a pile of problems.
Finding a suitable one will be a nightmare. Consider October to March is Australia and New Zealand's prime time; April-May is busy for the West Indies and Sri Lanka; April to September England are in full swing, and so on.
There's no common ground. The ICC have indicated there's no window until at least 2012.
Here's a test: given the chance, will you switch on to watch the Bangalore Royal Challengers play the Delhi Daredevils? Curiosity value perhaps for starters, but beyond that? 59 games? Didn't think so.