An old sports journalist colleague would have summed the state of the New Zealand team nicely as another winning position was frittered away in Hamilton this week.
"Dear oh dear," he'd have muttered. More than once.
Where to start fixing the New Zealand team. You could begin with just that. The name.
Get rid of the Black Caps and call them New Zealand. After all, that's who they're representing - and right now, pretty poorly too.
Black Caps was a cute renaming/rebranding of the national side a few years ago. It followed other sports, including hockey, basketball, netball, who thought it a snazzy new look. But the sight of merchandising and promotions for international series featuring England/Australia/India, etc, vs the Black Caps is wrong.
That's not to think simply reminding the players that they're playing for their country rather than a meaningless moniker is going to turn them into world beaters overnight. But it would be a start in terms of encouraging pride in performance, provided that notion has not been lost for the current group.
Once this World Cup campaign is over, NZ Cricket will need to take a hard look. It has to start at the top.
That means the board, the chief executive Justin Vaughan and down from there.
New Zealand have been beaten by a good, but by no means exceptional Pakistan side in the test and ODI series. Some of their cricket has been lamentable. Their ODI record has been trotted out and regularly updated with the grim humour which accompanies such statistics (currently one win and 14 losses from their last 15 matches).
A range of issues have been raised as reasons for the calamitous state of the national team. Unhappiness over player rotations leading up to the cup; having the selectors, and the coach and captain at odds over who should be playing - ie get in some pre-cup tinkering vs sticking with the best XI game in, game out - down to peripheral issues such as players' fascination with, and misuse of, a social networking site.
It was even suggested in this direction during the week that some players honestly believe what they tweet should not be used by those troublemaking TV, radio and print media types. That what they sent out to the world in 10-word bites, to be read in Albania, Alaska, Albuquerque and Auckland, should somehow remain private. If so, this suggests certain players need a fast lesson in the realities of life.
The players had a crunchy meeting at Seddon Park after Thursday night's loss. Evidently a few home truths were spelled out. Certainly not before time.
Tough talking behind closed doors is fine. But fans are being lost, patience is running out and someone needs to figure out how New Zealand got into this mess, and how to get out of it.
<i>David Leggat:</i> Begin by changing name of NZ team
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