KEY POINTS:
The secret is out.
The New Zealand batsmen struggled against the Sri Lankan bowlers because the tourists were unusual.
The Black Caps captain Stephen Fleming - who struggled to score in the one-dayers because he hardly played against them - revealed all over the weekend.
Boldly going where no other has gone before, Fleming declared his batters were delighted to be in Australia because: "What we are looking forward to here is more traditional actions."
Hey Steve: If we'd known about this before the Sri Lankan tour started, border control could have been placed on alert. Confess all - tick the boxes. Criminal convictions? Dangerous substances? Mud on the boots? Parakeet in the handbag? Unusual bowling action?
Too late now, the unusual bowling actions of Muttiah Muralitharan and Lasith Malinga were allowed in, and what havoc they caused. Both of them. Their other blokes did all right as well, although maybe they simply fed off the havoc caused by the unusual ones. Still, normal old Chaminda Vaas did nab three top order batters (including S. Fleming) for next to nothing at Eden Park.
Many people actually found it unusual that the Black Caps decided to meet the unusual Sri Lankans by not playing their usual team.
This was a case of meeting fire with fire. You sling the ball at us, and we'll sling our captain into the grandstands.
Thankfully, the Black Caps have arrived in the safe haven of Australia, a land remarkably free of cricketing weirdos. They've had the odd odd-one, of course, over the years.
Max Walker, for instance, bowled like a butterfly swimmer out of water. Jeff Thomson was a Malinga without the sidewinder.
Fleming's Black Caps would have hated Tangles and Thommo and all that unusualness. But, in general, the Aussies tend towards the classical techniques, if mixed with a brutish charm.
Don Bradman wrote the book on batting, literally. In general, Australian batsmen have eschewed techniques pioneered by New Zealand such as not practising, not moving your feet and, in the case of the Sri Lankan one-day series, not playing at all.
The Aussie bowlers have also tended away from the nuts and stuck to the nuts and bolts.
Flem's men would have been overjoyed at the sight of Dennis Lillee running smoothly towards them in his prime. Absolutely overjoyed.
They would have felt even more at home in noting Lillee's hair and moustache, which defined the age. Normal didn't get any more normal than that, and if you moved in certain circles like used car yards, Lillee took normal a step further with a gold medallion bouncing off the chest. Furthermore, his language towards opposing batsmen was particularly ordinary.
As Lillee leapt with that classical action and ripped the ball towards them with a flowing and perfect side-motion, Flem and his mates would have thought lovingly back to all those coaching manuals they had digested as kids.
"This is heaven," they could have murmured to themselves, "batting here against that normal bloke Lillee."
Even Warnie was pretty standard fare. He sure could talk it up in the press, and he did have a fair variety of deliveries. But, in terms of action, it was nothing to write home about.
Quite boring, in fact. As far as wrist spin goes, Warnie was standard fare.
As for the current lot, they are tailormade for Flem's blokes.
Glenn McGrath is dull as dishwater when it comes to technique. Not a hair out of place.
McGrath is an accident waiting to happen unless he can inject something weird into his technique. Without wanting to tell the man his job, maybe a bum wiggle here or a Hadlee shuffle there might give McGrath a chance. Maybe he could face square leg and whistle Waltzing Matilda during his delivery stride. That ought to do it. Otherwise, get ready for a summer drought, Glenn me boy.
As for Stuart Clark ... wake us all up when he steps out of place. Nathan Bracken, Mitchell Johnson ... standard trundlers and easy prey for the Black Caps, who are ruthless in destroying any sort of Joe Average of the traditional technique department.
So bring it on Australia, although there is one worrying facet. Whenever the Black Caps go to the Tri-Series, it is usual to the point of mandatory that someone else wins the trophy. It's also unusual if it's not Australia.
High
Wristy Ross Taylor's promising rampage against Australia in the one-day cricket. Yet another wonderful Thierry Henry goal for Arsenal - the man is a marvel.
Low
The Black Caps. Lots of theories, not much action. The prospect of a cricket tri-series where only one team counts no matter how hard the TV commentators tried to talk up New Zealand.
