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KEY POINTS:
A sneak preview of New Zealand's team meeting ahead of the first test against India.
Dan Vettori: "If we win the toss, we're going to bowl.'
Andy Moles: "Guys, it's important we start well, bowl good lines, hit the seam. There's some good players in that line-up. Let's have a look at some. Virender Sehwag - any thoughts?'
Vettori: "Dangerous player. If we don't get him early, he could take the game away from you.'
AM: "Rahul Dravid?'
Brendon McCullum: "Great player. If we don't get him early, he'll happily bat all day.'
AM: "Sachin Tendulkar?'
DV: "Top, top player. If we don't get him early, he'll make us look ordinary.'
AM: "What about VVS Laxman?'
BMcC: "Fantastic player. If we don't get him early, we could be staring at a total of 500-plus.'
AM: "Simple then - if we don't get them early, we're in the s***.'
Problem being, of course, not many get them all out early. You might be lucky to get one, two or even three out but rarely do all four of these prolific right-handers fail.
They are a phenomenon. Many countries, New Zealand included, would feel fortunate to have one right-hander of this class in their line-up. To have four requires almost a suspension of belief.
For bowlers, the prospect of a flat deck and this line-up must be the cricketing equivalent of meeting the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Scattered among four of India's six major urban conglomerates - Tendulkar is from Mumbai, Sehwag from Delhi, Laxman lives in Hyderabad and Dravid calls Bangalore home - each player has a distinct style but they all have one thing in common: they're at their happiest scoring runs, lots of them.
Four of the best right-handed batsmen in the world aim to take apart New Zealand's attack in the next few weeks:
Virender Sehwag
Easily the youngest of the four and with youth comes impetuosity. Sehwag knows one way to play: see the ball, hit the ball. . . hard. It can be a coach's nightmare and at times Sehwag has found himself dropped (oh, to have the luxury of being able to drop a guy with two triple centuries and a 50 average).
John Wright, in Indian Summers, wrote this illuminating little passage about what it is like to be the leader of a team containing Sehwag: "When Sehwag wandered in, I decided it was time for a sort-out. Not realising that my exasperation levels had soared into the red zone, I went up to him, grabbed him by the collar and barked. What the hell's going on? How can you come back inhere after playing a shot like that and unbuckle your pads as if nothing's happened?' Everyone froze - it was like someone had pulled out a gun.'
Coach's nightmare, spectator's dream.
Rahul Dravid
The most joyless accumulator of runs, Dravid suffers in comparison because he is so technically correct, measured and sells his wicket more dearly than the others (although Tendulkar of late has run him close).
Having the nickname The Wall' is never going to do a lot for your PR but Dravid is no Geoff Boycott. While he can block with the best of them - sometimes his bat seem a foot wide - Dravid also has a range of shots that ooze classicism.
His cover drive, pull and cut are up there with the best of them. Unlike Sehwag, most particularly, Dravid plays them only to the balls that they were designed for. But he proves that you don't always need to be innovative to be spectacular.
Sachin Tendulkar
The most worshipped cricketer in the world, Tendulkar knows a burden only the greatest can comprehend. No surprise then that a little of the joie de vivre seems to have gone from his batting - or perhaps the reflexes have just dulled ever so slightly after 20 years on the international treadmill.
You can't really pick a signature shot or a classic innings. He plays every shot well, even if he has abandoned some of the more cavalier ones, and he has played too many great innings.
In 2000, this Mumbaiker became the first player to score 50 international centuries. He now has more than 80 (by comparison, New Zealand's greatest centurion by some margin, Nathan Astle, mustered 27).
Simply the best.
VVS Laxman
Arguably the most attractive shotmaker in the game since the retirement of Mark Waugh, Laxman's numbers, however, appear the most underwhelming. But so too did Waugh's and you would happily shell out a goodly portion of your weekly wage to see either of these two flick a good length ball from outside off to the midwicket boundary.
One of Laxman's 13 test centuries was his epic, tide-turning 281 against Australia at Kolkata. He has taken particular delight in tormenting Australia and for that, you can only applaud him.
A former medical student, Laxman might lack a surgeon's cold consistency, like that of Dravid, but that makes him even more watchable.
Laxman is the Haagen-Dazs of this line-up. You could probably get almost as much satisfaction from eating Tip-Top but almost is the key word here. Pure luxury.