In a quiet moment he might admit it: a small part of run-machine Mathew 'Skippy' Sinclair is enjoying being a national embarrassment.
He's been left to squirm at the end of a selector's rope often enough. Now he'll just keep stacking the runs up and watch them squirm.
Embarrassing was how Ken Rutherford described the continued non-selection of Sinclair in the national team.
But far more embarrassing for New Zealand Cricket (NZC) were the comments of former coach Warren Lees yesterday, which gave air to the long-held belief that Sinclair's life was made a misery by a Canterbury oligarchy whenever he played for New Zealand. Lees' comments must throw up serious questions as to the culture that was allowed to develop in the Black Caps side.
Sinclair is considering upping sticks and taking a lucrative contract to play for Eastern Province. Not one cricket fan would blame him after his inexplicable treatment from selectors over the years. Where Sinclair's inconsistency has been highlighted, other equally inconsistent players have been given free reign without the threat of the axe every time they fail.
If he leaves, he'll need some extra room in his suitcase for his awards. Yesterday he was named Domestic Player of the Month for March by the New Zealand Cricket Players' Association. That followed hard on the heels of him winning the Redpath Cup for most meritorious batting in first-class cricket.
Sinclair has performed excellently during March to lead his side into the State Championship final versus Wellington that begins tomorrow at the Basin Reserve. He scored a century in both innings of Central's match against Otago, 121 and 103 not out, and followed it with scores of 101 and 53 against Auckland and 55 against Canterbury.
Last month Sinclair scored 437 runs in four championship matches at an average of 72.6. The 53 against Auckland still bugs Sinclair.
"I was seeing it like a pumpkin and telling myself the only way I was going to get out was to an unplayable delivery or a really good catch. And it was a really good catch that got me out," Sinclair said.
There's no great secret to Sinclair's sudden run glut.
"The only answer I can give is when you're in form it becomes like a winning habit. I started off with one century and accumulated from there."
Now he might be doing his accumulating for Eastern Province given that Sinclair doesn't see a way back into the Black Caps. This despite his assessment that, at 30, he's yet to reach his peak as a batsman. He's reached the conclusion if Bracewell is not going to pick him now, he's never going to pick him.
"These are the questions I've been asking myself," Sinclair said. "I can't see myself turning up in the line-up. The middle order is congested and Bracewell seems to only see me as a middle-order batsman.
"My best years are ahead of me so I've got some hugely important decisions coming up, mostly based around whether NZC want me. The ball's in their court."
Perhaps he needs to move on. Again, you can't blame him.
Sinclair's treatment at the hands of his peers, as highlighted by Lees ("all the jokes would have been at Sinclair's expense and after a while that begins to hurt," he told the Herald), has been one of NZC's great untold stories.
It's remained untold because Sinclair won't talk about it.
It might drip with irony, but it's a loyalty thing.
In that respect he's far more aware of the concept of "team-mate" than his colleagues ever were.
- HERALD ON SUNDAY
Cricket: Hop, skippy and jump ship
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