Stephen Fleming yesterday spoke of the power of family and friends as he fought his anxiety over a potentially cancerous tumour.
Now recovered after two bouts of surgery and a week in bed with tubes and drains coming out of his face, Fleming was yesterday recalled to the New Zealand team for today's third one-day international against Australia.
However, coach John Bracewell has opted to leave the captaincy in the hands of stand-in skipper Daniel Vettori for the final Chappell-Hadlee contest at Christchurch, reasoning that Fleming after a month out of action - needs the extra space to concentrate on his batting.
Even without the captaincy, the match will mark a dramatic turnaround for Fleming, who only weeks earlier had a tumour removed from under his left ear, and was nervously awaiting the biopsy results.
He said, if nothing else, the experience reminded him to keep a sense of perspective about cricket, and that there were bigger priorities in life apart from one's day job.
"It wasn't very hard [to be sidelined for so long] because I knew that [my health] was the most important thing," he said.
"At times like that cricket takes a back seat and friends and family become very important.
"I'm not saying it's changed my outlook on life or anything, but I just think it made me realise that things can get a little bit clouded.
"You get distracted and probably lose sight of what really counts; the important things."
Fleming revealed yesterday that a biopsy was performed on the tumour 10 months ago and declared benign, but that the virulence of the growth in the interim months had caused fresh alarm and concern.
The worst part was the three or four days while he waited on the latest biopsy results, a period that he readily admits left him feeling apprehensive and restless.
"Ten months ago we were hoping to use some sort of procedure to reduce it but it went the other way and started to develop further," he said.
"I had moments when I got pretty twitchy. There were a couple of times when you get a bit nervous. But a lot of other people and families go through worse than what I've gone through.
"In the end, it got to the point where it had to come out, but I think we were all surprised about how big it was.
"That was the hard bit. Knowing that they were obviously alarmed, and that you have to wait for the test to come back."
As for his readiness to play Australia today, he said there was an element of stiffness around the area operated on but that he was otherwise in good health, and looking forward to the experience.
The return of Fleming is expected to provide a boost for the New Zealand top-order, not only because of his vast experience but also because - as a left-hander - he breaks up a procession of right-handed teammates.
His only outing since the last operation was for his Wellington side against Canterbury, and he said the match at least represented an initial step in the right direction.
"It was a good test of the systems," he said of the State Championship game. Tomorrow I'll be as nervous as my first game, just waiting to get back into the middle at international level - but that's often when you're at your best."
Fleming has seldom played under another captain since first taking over the reins in 1997, but is fully supportive of the move to retain Vettori as captain, saying it would provide both the player and the team with important continuity.
"While it will be a little bit unusual, I think it's a fantastic move in terms of my re-introduction into international cricket, and also in terms of Dan's continuity.
"He's done a great job in this series, as we knew he would do, and I think it makes sense for him to continue."
The only uncertainty remaining about the New Zealand line-up concerns Lou Vincent, who will undergo a fitness test on his bruised knee this morning. If Vincent is ruled out of the 12, James Marshall will take his place.
Australia also named their line-up yesterday, with left-arm rookie Mitchell Johnson primed as the Supersub, and leg-spinning all-rounder Cameron White replacing his left-armed counterpart, Brad Hogg.
Teams
Australia: Ricky Ponting (captain), Adam Gilchrist, Simon Katich, Brad Hodge, Andrew Symonds, Michael Clarke, Michael Hussey, Cameron White, Nathan Bracken, Stuart Clark, Mick Lewis, Mitchell Johnson (SuperSub).
New Zealand: Daniel Vettori (captain), Stephen Fleming, Nathan Astle, Lou Vincent, Hamish Marshall, Scott Styris, Craig McMillan, Chris Cairns, Jacob Oram, Brendon McCullum, Kyle Mills, James Franklin.
Cricket: Fleming fit and ready for best
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