Parents who have invested countless hours honing children’s forward defences could be forgiven for grinding their teeth.
Neil Wagner copped the brunt of the assault, registering the most expensive 11 overs to start an innings in test history with figures of two for 104. Bazball claimed another statistical victim.
England were committed to delivering a relentless and ruthless dismantlement of the New Zealanders’ self-esteem.
Yet that’s where a conjuring trick takes hold. Momentum had been established, but the sleight of hand – or perhaps more appropriately bat – is that Stuart Broad (7), Pope (49), Brook (54) and Joe Root (57) had departed by tea. New Zealand were still in the contest.
Aside from Broad’s seven, the other three had chances to consolidate and prosper on a flat, batting-friendly pitch but chose to keep flaying.
That takes discipline and selflessness to use strike rate rather than personal averages as a team objective.
The English narrative is now peppered with such Baz-speak. Broad has been designated the role “nighthawk” rather than the traditional “nightwatchman”, with a brief to slay runs and prevent a more specialist batter donning the pads beyond dusk.
Root, too, was a case in point. He risked a reverse sweep in the final over before the tea break and pinballed a catch from wicketkeeper Tom Blundell to first slip Daryl Mitchell. Yet McCullum believes the pre-meditated stroke gains more than it loses.
Such a dogma of aggression trumps almost any form of prudence, although Ben Foakes provided a relatively circumspect 51.
Perhaps some tee times had become available at Millbrook tomorrow?
Years need to pass before the cricket fraternity can label this a reign to emulate the West Indies from the late 1970s to early 1990s or Australia from the mid-1990s to mid-2000s. A medium-term benchmark is The Ashes and the world championship, in that order.
However, at present the rise of the new England philosophy is justifiably immune from criticism, or at least buys considerable insurance. Nine wins out of 10 tests cannot be wrong, although five losses in six pink-ball encounters needs addressing. That variance is poised to receive a boost at Bay Oval – unless the New Zealand tortoise can miraculously pip the English hare.
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