But maybe in his own crazy way, England legend Boycott understood how vulnerable this New Zealand team was against Ben Stokes’ unit.
Helped by a disastrous catching display by the home side in Christchurch, England have rocketed to a 2-0 series lead.
Coach Brendon McCullum and co appear to be doing a great job of regenerating their team, including the so-far inspired selection of Jacob Bethell – a kid who doesn’t even have a first-class century yet – to bat at number three.
England coach Brendon McCullum alongside captain Ben Stokes on day two of the test at the Basin Reserve. Photo / Photosport
For starters, the former Kiwi captain and master blaster is a fascinating character and publicity magnet, unlike the current Kiwi Grimmer Twins Gary Stead and Tom Latham.
McCullum has turned the England test team around, and is about to work his spell on their white ball side.
New Zealand desperately needs some McCullum Magic again.
He’s still got three years left with his England contract, but is only 43.
Come back, Baz!
WINNER: The Liam Lawson Formula One excitement
It’s decision time for Red Bull this week, and Kiwi fans will have their fingers crossed that Liam Lawson gets the biggest break in motor racing, or indeed world sport.
Lawson is said by some to be the frontrunner to partner the legendary Max Verstappen, who has just claimed his fourth F1 drivers’ championship for the powerful team.
This could turn out to be the biggest Kiwi sports story of 2024. Fingers crossed.
Lawson’s rival in Red Bull’s sister team is Yuki Tsunoda who brings with him the prized Japanese market.
But Lawson’s poise and long term prospects are pushing him to the forefront.
Added to that, McLaren – the most famous name in Kiwi motor racing – has just won the F1 constructors’ title for the first time since 1998, a result confirmed by the Lando Norris victory in Abu Dhabi.
Formula One is the most glamorous sport on the planet, and right now Kiwi identities are in the thick of it.
WINNER: The new Black Ferns … and an amazing old one
Found another gear after a poor start to beat the rising USA in the Cape Town Sevens final.
The great Sarah Hirini was central to the victory – the respect for veteran Hirini, her influence on the Kiwi game, is mammoth.
It looks as though she is helping usher in another fine era after the post-Olympic retirements of a few greats.
WINNER: Football
New Zealand football is enjoying a spell in the sun, thanks to Chris Wood and Auckland FC.
Nottingham Forest striker Wood scored yet again in the English Premier League, his header helping sink Manchester United.
Forest are near the top of the EPL and talk is turning to them qualifying for Europe – incredible given that they finished one place above the relegated trio last season.
Wood’s run of goals is central to that turnaround, and winning him regular notice among the English media and the EPL’s famous pundits.
And for good measure, classy Kiwi wingback Liberato Cacace scored his first goal for Empoli in Italy’s Serie A.
Meanwhile, Auckland FC and the Wellington Phoenix packed out Mt Smart Stadium on Saturday for what turned into a heated and thrilling A-League clash.
Auckland FC captain Horoki Sakai celebrates after the first goal against the Phoenix on Saturday. Photo / Photosport
Okay, this is just one anecdote. But when you hear someone say their grandkid is an Auckland FC fan, there is a minor football breakthrough going on. And the rivalry between the Auckland and Wellington clubs feels real. Fantastic.
WINNER: Alex Rufer
Yes, his Wellington Phoenix were beaten, again, by Auckland FC. But midfielder Alex Rufer is the heartbeat of the Phoenix, a club that deserves so much respect for keeping the A-League dream alive in New Zealand after Auckland’s double failure many years ago.
You sense frustration in the likes of coach Giancarlo Italiano that the impression they made last season is being swept aside by Auckland FC’s incredible start to their inaugural campaign.
Rufer fought to the bitter end on Saturday. He set up the late Phoenix goal that turned the match into a nail-biter. Got to love his attitude. He’s my most admired Kiwi footballer right now.
France had a good reason – player welfare. Their win is great for the New Zealand public, even if the French team will apparently be of dubious quality for the three-test series.
The New Zealand national rugby administration is tier one in ambition and status, tier two or three in performance.
Chris Rattue has been a journalist since 1980 and is one of the most respected opinion writers in New Zealand sports journalism.
