There wasn't a perfect way to handle the stain on basketball legend Kobe Bryant's career, life, in the immediate wake of his tragic death.
But the one thing you cannot do is ignore it.
In 2003, a 25-year-old Bryant was accused by a 19-year-old woman of raping her. Whenyou read the police interview transcripts, the way the incident played out, Bryant's response, it is clear that something dreadful happened.
In terms of escaping a trial, and probable prison sentence, Bryant got off when the woman opted not to testify. Quite quickly, he got off in the court of public opinion as well, becoming a global superstar.
But after the helicopter carrying Bryant, his 13-year-old-daughter and seven others went down in California, it became impossible not to re-visit a case in which you wonder why the justice system could not have done a better job.
Because to ignore what happened in 2003 is to ignore the accuser, the millions of victims of sexual assault and the fact that rampant assaults on women are still a tragic fact of life.
Perhaps the most astounding reaction came from the Washington Post which, in a gross misjudgement, suspended a reporter who pointed to the 2016 Daily Beast investigation which highlighted justifiable concerns around the Bryant case (before hastily "clearing" her from any wrongdoing less than two days later).
Kobe Bryant. Photo / Photosport
It is hard to remember a sadder day for the media. The paper revered as central to the most famous press investigation of all time - Watergate - lost its mind in a moment of national grief, fearing a backlash and PR disaster no doubt.
You may question the timing of the Felicia Sonmez tweet (although I don't), but it was still a legitimate action. Those who adored Bryant may have felt hurt, but that pain may be nothing compared to what the Bryant accuser – and victims of sexual assault – go through.
I hope Washington Post newsroom leaders will not only prioritize their employees’ safety in the face of threats of physical harm but also ensure that no journalist will be punished for speaking the truth.
Or to put it another way, there is no good time to get raped and time may never properly heal the emotional wounds.
Far from getting anything wrong, Sonmez did something very right, and brave. The firestorm of protest she received, which included death threats, says a lot about how rape is or has been perceived.
When it is committed by obviously twisted and troubled people, society's outliers, it is easy to pursue the culprits, condemn them, punish them.
But our rapists and sexual assailants don't only reside in dark places. They are, for the want of a better description, normal everyday Joes. And as we are finding out at alarming pace, they include a disturbing amount of celebrities.
Kobe Bryant. Photo / Getty
They also include, according to two women, two Presidents of the United States.
There are a myriad of sexual misconduct allegations against the current Oval office resident, Donald J. Trump.
There is also a claim of rape against former President Bill Clinton made by a woman named Juanita Broaddrick, an allegation that seems credible beyond disbelief.
Clinton was Arkansas attorney general and Broaddrick a prospective campaign volunteer when the 1978 incident occurred. We are talking about a man who, at the time, was a powerful justice figure, and a woman who was offering to help his career for free.
Among the many allegations by women against President Trump is one by E. Jean Carroll, a 76-year-old columnist, who says he raped her in a dressing room at a New York department store.
U.S. President Donald Trump. Photo / AP
Women have found new ways of fighting back. Things will change, but it is taking time.
The dynamics in many of these sort of situations can be complicated. Reading over the 2003 incident which led to a civil case and apology, there is the feeling Bryant came to understand the gravity of his actions although without publicly admitting to them fully.
But women have been preyed on and professional sport contains some of the most ferocious hunters. And the America Bryant lived and died in still uses selective denial.
In most democracies, Trump's history around women would preclude him from even standing for office rather than being on track to get re-elected.
The #MeToo Movement has put famous men with bad intentions on notice, but old habits die hard.
This is still America, where celebrity is king. The more you consider 2003, the more it should hurt Bryant's legacy in some way. But fame at his level will, over time, obliterate any infamy. Kobe Bryant can rest in peace.
