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Algerian refugee Ahmed Zaoui grabbed his gear and went to play soccer when he was told his family were not allowed to come to New Zealand.
He said he did not want to think about a decision that disappointed him, though he accepted it with "serenity and courage".
His first reaction was to block the news out, he told Radio New Zealand.
"I tried to forget...I was thinking to talk to my family how can I explain to them the situation because the situation is too hard... but I accepted."
Mr Zaoui said he had been 70-80 per cent confident his family would be allowed to join him.
"I was thinking that New Zealand want to make a courageous decision about bringing my family to join me," he said in his broken English.
His lawyers lodged an appeal before Christmas for his wife and four children to join him in New Zealand, while the security risk certificate issued against him was being reviewed.
But Immigration Minister David Cunliffe said yesterday that would not be appropriate while Mr Zaoui's status remained undecided.
Mr Zaoui has been struggling to stay in New Zealand since he arrived in the country illegally in December 2002 and sought refugee status.
His wife Leila and four sons, three teenagers and one aged eight, are in South East Asia and he applied for them to come here.
Mr Zaoui said it was hard to describe how he felt when lawyer Deborah Manning told him the news and he had to call his family.
"I have struggled to make my kids understand the decision, the logic why I am in this situation, why I am away from them more than four years."
He said his youngest boy Youssef was worried he was being persecuted in New Zealand.
Mr Zaoui said as his family had been assessed as refugees by UNHCR he could not see why they could not come.
New Zealand First MP Peter Brown said yesterday Mr Zaoui could get on a plane to visit his family.
Mr Zaoui hotly disputed this saying he had no passport and return to Algeria was not an option.
Mr Zaoui said accusations against him were untrue.
"I try to show that I am a peaceable man, I am not a criminal, I am not a terrorist. I am a victim of a dictatorship in Algeria."
He would talk to his lawyer to see if there was any other avenue to bring his family here.
Green MP Keith Locke said the decision was wrong.
"This is a heartless decision which makes Mr Zaoui's poor wife and family suffer for the interminable delays of Mr Cunliffe's own government.
"It's silly to think the presence of a woman and four children in New Zealand is going to prejudice any legal determinations in the Zaoui case."
When Mr Zaoui, formerly elected an MP in Algeria, came to New Zealand he sought refugee status on the grounds he would be tortured or killed if he was sent back to his homeland.
He spent almost two years in prison waiting for his case to be decided as he fought the security risk certificate and moves to remove him from the country.
Mr Zaoui was released on bail in December 2004 after a Supreme Court hearing, and has since lived with the Catholic community in the Dominican Priory in Auckland awaiting a hearing.
The hearing to review the security risk certificate was expected to be held between June and August this year.
Mr Zaoui told Radio New Zealand he was passing the time coaching soccer, a game he previously described as a stress release, doing volunteer work and giving lectures.
- NZPA
