Wyn Drabble says he prefers to do gardening while clothed. Photo / NZME
Wyn Drabble is a teacher of English, writer, public speaker and musician. He is based in Hawke’s Bay.
OPINION
Did you ever imagine you could combine an interest in the freedom afforded by nudity with involvement in horticulture? Well, you can.
It’s called World Naked Gardening Day and in most parts of the world it is held on the first Saturday in May though Canadians are putting in a claim for the first Saturday in June – to protect their frost-tender bits from their colder climate.
WNGD was set up by Mark Storey , consulting editor for Nude & Natural magazine, in conjunction with Jacob Gabriel, a permaculturalist. The first WNGD occurred on September 10, 2005, but in 2007 the date was moved to the first Saturday in May.
The good news for Kiwis is that the New Zealand Naturist Federation adopted the last weekend in October. The bad news is, you’ve just missed it.
But there is another day not too far away, a day which also celebrates nudity but is less specific about the activity with which it is partnered. Pencil in February 2 as Work Naked Day.
If you’re a tad prudish, there are plenty of other days which don’t involve nudity. There are days which celebrate certain foods such as Strawberry Ice Cream Day (January 15), Oatmeal Nut Waffle Day (March 11), Chocolate-covered Raisins Day (March 24) and the rather more general Chocolate-covered Anything Day (December 16).
On the more decadent end of the scale is Eat Ice Cream for Breakfast Day (February 3).
If you’re a big fan of baking soda you can also celebrate that kitchen staple on Bicarbonate of Soda Day (December 30). It’s easy for us to take for granted the contribution baking soda has made to our households in the fields of baking and cleaning alike. That said, the night before New Year’s Eve might find us a little busy with other matters.
Nothing Day (January 16) was created as a day to provide Americans with one national day on which they don’t have to celebrate, honour, or observe anything.
Even more Pythonesque-sounding is Backwards Day (January 31). Activities could include wearing your clothes inside out, wearing shoes on the opposite feet or even walking backwards – all for the simple reason of being a little bit silly.
I promise I am not making up any of these days.
Animal fanciers might like to celebrate Penguin Awareness Day (January 20), Squirrel Appreciation Day (January 21), Frog-jumping Day (May 13) or Dance Like a Chicken Day (May 14).
Two that you’d naturally expect to appeal to me are Word Nerd Day (January 9) and Punctuation Day (September 24). Word nerds could just enjoy saying felicitous-sounding or amusing-sounding words (snapdragon, phlebotomy, punctilious, flannel, ointment) or set a goal of learning a certain number of new words during the day.
Observers of Punctuation Day could cruise their local streets with a ladder and paint, eliminating gratuitous apostrophes from signs or adding them where they are required.
Toothache Day (February 9) sounds rather a tough ask. While its name may suggest having to encourage caries to appear on that particular day, it’s more about raising awareness of the importance of oral hygiene. Perhaps celebrate with a floss. Or just grin and bear it.
But it’s time to head back to World Naked Gardening Day because many of you are wondering whether I took part during the last weekend of October. The answer is no and that’s because two disciplines are involved and I’m only really a fan of one of them.
You see, the fact is I wouldn’t want to do anything half-heartedly. So, if I need to head to the garden to rein in my oxalis or wandering willie, I’ll do it clothed, thank you.
Unless, of course, there is a World Half-hearted Day.